Money is an obvious answer, but what about any special items such as jewelry, tools, property? How much hassle and conflict did you have to go through with others in order to get that stuff?

43 comments

  1. I love my family but I legit am expecting nothing and will be pleasantly surprised if anything is left besides bills and chores/cleaning.

  2. Not tied to specific inheritance, but good luck OP if you are getting ready to go through that. It can be an ugly process. I know I have family members that will not speak to the rest of the family, but you can always count on them to be at funerals and kissing up to the elderly, just to see if there is anything for them in a will. It is disgusting. Then, if things don’t go how they think they should, they don’t hesitate to try to sue other family members.

  3. Hasn’t happened yet, thankfully, but I’m going to be getting an old (early 1900s) shotgun that was made by the Ithaca Gun Company

  6. Nothing. I had to support my parents in their later years because all their money went to my father’s medical care. (they lived with me and my husband, after they couldn’t live in the home I bought them anymore)

    They died a few years ago. All that was left was the ashes (they died within a year of each other) and my sister went and retreived them first and kept them. My bro sued to get some of the ashes (my mom’s wishes were they were mixed with my dad and each kid got a third).

    My sis dumped them in the ocean (which was pretty bogus since my mom was afraid of the water).

    It was a big ole mess but I just stayed out of it and never engaged.

    Sadly, my bro died choking in a restaurant this past year and then I couldn’t get into his apartment. I went through legal channels to be the responsible party to get a few items I gave him, but the apartment gave stuff to some cop with a moving company/storage facility business and he sold all his belongings and art at an auction. The business is “legit” but he doesn’t answer a phone and I even drove to his town/business but he’s just never around. The reviews for his business (he often takes eviction apartments and “holds it”) are terrible. He charges like 300 a month for storage fees, etc and makes impossible to get a hold of him so it drags it out. I must have tried to contact him 150 times. Not something some poor guy with a minimum wage job likely has the opportunity to do.

  8. Some jewelry of my grandparents was split between my siblings and me. Parents are getting older now and I’ve been trying to get them to write up wills because I am not dealing with my siblings bullshit.

  13. Property, money, a hefty and healthy stock portfolio. The house is in Houston and a week after their death had 6 feet of water in it from the hurricane, so we lost pretty much all the stuff inside, including two cars in the garage. But it’s back in great shape now.

    The inheritance is setup as a trust, my sister and I each have equal access to all of it. We are not in the business of fighting with each other when there’s plenty to go around for us both.

  15. A lot of historical quirky things my grandfather had got passed to me since my dad couldn’t take them.
    Prior to me and my dad, pretty much every man in our family served in the British armed forces. A cavalry sword from the Crimean war that went back several generations. A half burnt officers hat from when a fire broke out on his destroyer. Too many medals to name. The weirdest thing he left was a cannonball he claims he stole from the USS constitution whilst touring it.

    I have no way of authenticating any of, and I do suspect that most of it is at least slightly embellished. But it all makes for great stories anyways.

    I did have to fight one of my cousins for a lot of it. He kind of rightfully claimed that I had less of a right to it since I’m not English like my grandfather was, but he wanted to sell it and I wasn’t going to let that happen.

  16. We’re getting jewelry and a coin collection (that will probably be sold), and a few rocks and artifacts. Their house is going for cheap on account of never being updated or fixed (downstairs drain pipes are literally rust and concrete), though the neighbors won’t be happy about that. Pool table is staying in the house

  17. When my great uncle passed away I personally got a bunch of antiquity era coins from around the world. I’m into cooking so I also kept a bunch of medieval era pots and pans (have never tried to use them) Also letters from Queen Victoria thanking his grandfather for the stuff he sold them. (The family were antique dealers). There was a ton of other stuff too from but my dad, aunts and uncles sold it all and divided the money.

  18. My two oldest close relatives died in the space of a month, last year. And my parents died a while ago. (I lost other relatives, in the last few years, but I wasn’t in their wills, so they’re outside this discussion.) So I’ve got some background on this.

    I’m not going to say specific money or items but mostly it was civil. Both my parents and my aunts and uncles had heard and witnessed horror stories about families bitter about wills and such, wanted to prevent that, and told us so .

    (You might think this means we’re rich, but no- from what I understand the really vicious stuff happens when its *low* stakes. It was more about preventing lifelong rifts because two of us wanted the same bowl or chair or whatever than lots of money. This really happens.)

    My parents, maybe 20 years before it became an issue, sat my sisters and me down for a conversation about it- their main wish was that we (their kids) stay friends, even after they were gone, so they wanted us to settle any disputes over who-gets-what while they were alive. We ended up working out specific sentimental items, and who would get what. No surprises.

    In the latter case, the only problems came because everything was moving so fast. (Unlike with my parents, who left their house to someone who was going to live in it, we were on a short timetable because this house was up for sale and needed to be cleaned up, cleared out and staged.) There were more people we didn’t ourselves know involved (their friends, etc) and so on. We mainly wanted anything we didn’t personally deal with to go to a person and not sold off impersonally.

    The actual paperwork involved was mainly crossing T and dotting Is with a lawyer about making sure the state got its taxes. (and then, in the latter case, dealing with real estate.) And funerary arrangements, of course. The items themselves we just took home with us.

  19. My grandma’s wedding ring. My aunt had it initially, but when I got married I asked to borrow it. Both of my grandmas have passed away, and I wanted to have their rings tied in my bouquet. My aunt sent the ring, one of my grandpa’s hankies, and told me to keep both. I wear the ring every day.

    All of the things I have, including the ring, have much more sentimental value than monetary value. This includes things like a cheap pressed glass bowl, a piece of Christmas decor, some costume jewelry, etc. The value in all those things come from childhood memories.

    We didn’t really fight over anything, but no one was being really greedy either. Everyone had a few items they really wanted, and there was little overlap. Where there was overlap, everyone was pretty good about trying to keep things equitable. Or like with aforementioned item of Christmas decor, there were multiples to go around.

  20. My mom died in December. I inherited all her china, jewelry, and silver. That is 22 sets of dishes (of varies sizes) and three silver sets. I do not know what to do with all that. Who else needs or wants formal and informal Christmas dishes or lighthouses or fish or Halloween or Easter or snowmen (three different ones) or pumpkin or the very large collection of Autumn. I have only gotten two sets of silver and one set of dishes home (Schumann Empress Flowers). No one is fighting over this.

  21. Books! Family recipes and some various nicknacks including a porcelain horse. Some handmade blankets.

    When my paternal grandmother passed it was easy, my dad and uncles split things and left me the books and recipes (I was a kid so they took care of it until I was older).

    When my paternal grandfather passed his wife ignored his wishes regarding specific family heirlooms.

    When my great grandfather passed I got some money from my grandmother because I helped care for him for a few years until he passed. It caused an argument in the family because my oldest aunts felt they deserved the money for being the oldest grandchildren. It was stupid. The money was my grandmothers and great uncles and they (my great uncles) decided to give it to my grandmother since she had been his primary caregiver and asked her to pass a bit on to me and my youngest aunt for all we did to help.

    When my great grandmother passed everything was left to her children (bio and step) and those same aunts were upset and couldn’t understand why they didn’t get any money. They felt since they were so close to her when they were young she would have wanted them to have some. Regardless her will left it to her kids. Besides they didn’t bother to visit the last few years of her life, apparently it was “too hard” to see her like that (dementia). It was hard on my grandmother but apparently that doesn’t matter.

    Sorry I am still a bit mad about that.

  22. I got my gran’s 50th anniversary ring. I was supposed to get her wedding band as well, but it was unfortunately accidentally buried with her. My parents gave it to my husband when he asked for their blessing to marry me. I was also promised her teacup collection but have yet to see a single one. As far as I know they’re still somewhere safe in the house, but I’m gonna be mad if someone else takes them.

  23. My grandparents house was the big thing.

    I also got all of my grandfather’s journals that he had kept almost every day for 60 years.

    Mental Illness.

  24. From my Grandma on my mom’s side, I’ve got a pair of earrings, a set of fine china that I use pretty much any time I have a nicer than average meal, an armchair, a garlic press, and an ice cream scoop. I was 23 when she passed away.

    From dad’s side, I’ve got a belt and some costume jewelry, plus a blanket Nana crocheted for me when she knew she was going to die. I was 7 when she passed away, 10 when Grandpa did. I’ve also got a table that Grandpa made, but that’s something that my parents gave to me after I became an adult.

    There was some conflict between my dad’s siblings that took a few years to really resolve. No serious acrimony, just enough for some mild bad feeling. Grandma had a clearer will and her kids didn’t want conflict so there wasn’t much and none of it affected the grandkids.

  25. I got a pinball machine, a bunch of tools and a train set from my dad. He’s still around, they just moved to Florida and did not have room for that stuff.

  26. It wasn’t in her will, but I would up with a good amount of my Nana’s stuff. I ultimately got her end-grain kitchen table my dad made in shop class in the late 70s, a livingroom end table, a bunch of milk glass ash trays and one nice big crystal ash tray.

  27. I have two grandfather’s that I sorry of adopted. I saw them and loved them far more than my two bio grandfather’s. From one I got a couple of letters he wrote during his time serving in the military and from the other a wickedly cool cane. That’s the cane that I am going to use if I ever need one.

  28. An 1841 side by side flintlock shotgun. A knockdown 1800’s armoire I’ve refinished. My dad’s coin collection (added to mine). Lots of china and silverware. A paid for house that I split with my brother (we bought him out)

  29. Well I inherited a guilt complex and depression… That’s what’ll happen when your mother has you at 16 and hates your guts for just existing when did… 🤷‍♂️

  30. My grandmother passed away a few years ago. Really, all she had of value was her house, she was very, very poor. I did take some useful items from her home, such as a pot & pan & some glassware, blankets, an odd trinket here or there. The majority of her stuff was sold for dirt cheap or dropped off at the thrift store until they told us not to bring any more stuff. I tried to look for items of sentimental value, but really, I care more about memories than physical objects, and there were no objects that were really crucial to remembering her. I listen to her favorite music or wear items of her favorite color when I want to remember her.

  32. Not to me, but my dad ended up inheriting his grandparent’s farm in East Texas and a house in town. But no one lives within an hour of the properties, so we ended up selling the house and the farm is for sale now

  34. I’ll tell you what I DIDN’T inherit. So my grandfather had a Union rifle from the Civil War that was passed down through the generations. One day he decided to sell it without telling anyone.

  35. A beautiful hutch and dining room table. Nice solid wood. There was no drama, she said she would like me to have them and everyone else was fine with that. There was some hassle in actually transporting them to my house because they’re quite large and heavy, but I’m glad to have them.

  36. My mother passed away this year. My dad urged everyone who came down (they live a plane ride away from anyone else) to take anything we wanted, please, so there was less for him to deal with.

  37. A deep appreciation for Southern rock and the blues.

    Aside from that, nothing directly. Thus far, every family member of mine who has passed away left everything to the surviving spouse which has worked out decently well.

  40. Aside from $30,000 in 1989, a few of my grandfather’s books.

    That $30,000 changed my life, by the way. Not only did I pay off the last of my debt, but I quit the sweatshop where I had worked 60-hour weeks, went to New Zealand for three weeks, and then returned to start my own business. I’ve worked for myself ever since.

    And I spent the last two grand of it on my wife’s engagement ring. So while some could say that I blew that inheritance, I think it was money extremely well spent.

  41. Thankfully not much. My parents are still with us and healthy. I got a few items from my grandmother when she passed. Mostly just family memorabilia. One thing I got was this

    https://i.imgur.com/kXlZvok.jpg

    It is the crucifix that was placed on my grandfathers coffin when he passed at age 56. My grandmother had it hanging above her bed until she passed at age 86.

    Suffice to say it means a lot to me.

  42. Chronic health problems, substance abuse issues, and a Glock my dad bought in 2008 because Obama’s jackbooted thugs were going to come to our house and steal all of our money.

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