My (22f) gf (22f) a very active sex life, however, it’s uneven.
We’ve been together for a year, but it took a while for us to start having sex because this is the first time either of us have dated a woman. She’s been with a man before, but she is my first.
During sex, I usually initiate and am the dominant one 99% of the time. My girlfriend always consents enthusiasticly and is receptive to anything I do, however, she has never touched me below the neck sexually. The most she will do is kiss my neck (which I thoroughly enjoy) but when I hint for her to do more, she seems scared and would rather joke her way out than commit to touching me.
I think about asking more directly, but I’m not entirely sure how.
At first, I felt like she didn’t find me attractive or that she’s more interested in what I can do for her rather than what we can do for one another. I feel resentful of her because I put more effort into her pleasure than she does for me. But, as time has gone on, I feel like she has a lot of anxiety and is scared of doing something I may not like, so she’d rather do nothing at all. She always says how much she enjoys the sex we have and how she does enjoy kissing my neck, I just don’t understand why she won’t do more.
How do I talk to her about this? How do I ask her more directly for what I want? I don’t think she’s doing this maliciously, I think she’s just nervous.
Thankful for any advice.
1 comment
Maybe she’s afraid of touching you, thinking that she can hurt you, or not let you enjoy her touch. You can try to guide her hand on you, not necessarily during sex but just as exploration, like getting naked and let her see your body while she is clothed, take her hand and move it on you. It could work, but first you have to sit and talk about the reason she’s afraid of doing it