Wrote this on a burner because it’s painfully embarrassing. I’m very new to having a boyfriend or doing anything sexual in nature with him. Around a month ago he brought up the idea of performing oral sex on one another, an idea that I was very excited by and still am. The problem is, when we get some alone time and clothes start to come off, all of a sudden I feel really nervous and sick and even though I want to, I’m just so scared to go down on him or vice versa that I end up asking to stop.
My boyfriend is lovely and is always very patient and loving with me and says he is more than happy to wait a while to make sure I’m comfortable but I hate the fact I get him so rilled up only to let him down. I know it’s not fair on him and it’s happened a few times now.
Do I just need to bite the bullet and push past my nervousness because I know I want to? Is there something that could be wrong with me? Is it just a time thing because I don’t want to wait forever. Has anyone experienced something similar to this?
Any advice would be appreciated. (Also sorry if it’s formatted weird, I’m on my phone).
6 comments
Just do a little bit of exploring at a time. Start with something you’re comfortable with, like one of you resting your head on the other’s chest. Then kiss their belly. That can be enough to start. There’s no rush.
Just go slow and step by step. You have no experience with a penis so why not just look at it at first, maybe even touch if you feel adventurous. There really is no rush and it takes time to get used to another’s body. It’s the same with him and your vagina, I’m sure he would love to just look at it for a little while and see what’s what. Take your time take it easy, most importantly think about each others pleasure and have fun.
If you haven’t touched his private parts yet, or he hasn’t touched yours, make sure you explore doing that first before diving into trying anything oral. You want to have an idea of what you are working with and also being more comfortable with him touching you. Once you feel confident with you touching each other then you may feel less anxious about moving to oral sex. When that time comes take it slow and just start with both of you doing some slow licking and exploring what feels good. No need to try to start putting his dick in your mouth straight away, explore till you are comfortable with trying it 🙂 There is nothing wrong with you it is completely normal to feel nervous about doing it.
Maybe start off by masterbating next to eachother then if that feels better and eases into the idea of letting him go down on you
Good luck, or lick 🙃
You should try
Yes yes yes to this!
Okay, so I have had the same problem for a while! My first sexual partner was when I was 19 and he wanted to 69. I’d never had a guy go down on me before and I was freaked out. We did it and it was such a turn off for me because of the creepy noises and stuff he made, and so then any time it came up with him or any other guy, I did not want to be eaten out. Also, sometimes it’s a little awkward having someone’s head down there.
My advice? If you’re nervous about receiving oral, start off by giving him a toy to use on you. This way, he can see what spots of you are sensitive and it eases you into being the center of his attention at that moment, and learning what you like and enjoy. After a while, if you feel more comfortable and at ease, then you can have him go down on you.
Honestly this is what has worked best for me! However you chose to proceed, I hope everything turns out great!