I have been seeing this guy from like about a month and he wants to go on a short break in august as well our Amsterdam plan with friends got cancelled due to them being broke
Anyway he wants to go away in our country and we be sharing a bed together
I mean we kissed like twice and hug and hold hands, but we only kiss when drunk as he said he’s super nervous to kiss me, even when drunk he said he sometimes is super nervous to do so
I’m scared he is gonna wanna have sex when we go away, but then I’m like he’s always nervous to kiss me , so am I reading too much into it
How can I even bring this up, if I’m overthinking it and he’s not even thinking about sex, I’m gonna look weird
3 comments
That’s a tough one – I don’t think you’re overthinking it, it just seems like a confusing situation since he’s so shelters and nervous. I mean, I don’t think casually bringing up the sex would be horrible but just make sure to listen and read the convo – if it gets weird just stop talking about it 🙂
Have a conversation with him and be honest; tell him how you feel. His response is how you’ll be able to see what his intentions are. If he dismisses your feelings (even if he denies he wants to do anything) then I’d be cautious. If he is aggressive or apprehensive, run. If he is caring, understanding and tries to figure out how to set boundaries so you feel comfortable, then you found someone gold. Hope you can figure it out, cheers!
The best thing you can do is COMMUNICATE. It’s hard and feels weird when you are young, but as a 39 year old if I could go back in time and tell myself one thing it would be COMMUNICATE. I was always a shy dude and I assumed the people I was crushing on knew exactly what I was thinking, played games, kind of beat around the bush with subjects like sex because it was awkward.
I would sit down and say hey “I know this is awkward, but I want to make sure we’re on the same page”. You can let him know you like him, you enjoy being around him, and are excited about going on a trip and getting to know him better. However you can also explain while you do like him, it’s too soon for sex and you would like to just hang out, share some experiences, and get to know him better and see where it goes.
Do not assume the other person is thinking the same things you are. If you have something you want to talk about, TALK ABOUT IT. Anyone who really cares about you shouldn’t have a problem with that. This is where most relationships fail, communication.