I am in 20s and I have some acquaintances but I never had a friend who would invite me to hang out, sleep over, study group, etc. I never had a friend who can celebrate my birthday and buy me birthday gifts. I never had a friend who I can talk about anything I want or ones who I can have long and deep philosophical discussions. These kind of friends often exist in novels and movies I read and watch and it hurts me when I think about myself.
9 comments
I personally think those kind of friends are a bit overrated from books and movies. Ive never really had a “true” friend by your definition either. Ive had friends that i can have a fun time with, but i wouldnt say ive ever had a best friend or at least not since grade school.
No.
I’m in my 40s, and although we don’t talk as much, there’s people that are only a phone call away.
I’m not sure what is different about me and my friends but a lot of it is probably because we grew up in the same area.
You know how people usually don’t believe in soul mates anymore? Because we know that the type of romantic relationships portrayed in movies aren’t realistic?
This also applies to friendship. I’m not saying friends don’t exist, just like I’m not saying people never meet a romantic partner that really is suited to them. It’s just that it can be rare, and it doesn’t at all look like what it does in the movies.
Idk I’ve nvr had any ether but Idc I’m comfortable with the idea of if people joining me on my journey to succeed if they don’t I don’t need em
The way you describe friendship sounds so one way where it’s all about what they can do for you. If you want to make friends then go be the one inviting people out or to study, don’t just wait for an invitation
I don’t think most adults have friends like that. I think those kinds of friendships mostly only happen in fiction. I don’t know whether that’s good or bad but I’m pretty sure it’s normal.
I cut ties with a lot of people because as soon as I needed help there was no one there for me. It is very rare to have a true friend, most are acquaintances but be careful believing people that say they are your friends because you wont count on them
Have you tried being a friend to you first? 🙂 Usually that’s what attracts people to you. When they sense you’re at ease with your own company and you brighten your own day
I think that it really depends on how you look into it. All of the things you mentioned you define as having a true friendship and most come from, as other commentaries said, movies and media. Friendship has many types and fixating on one will limit your chances of experiencing it fully. There are types of friends who rarely talk or even meet yet they’re there for each other in big moments of life. There is also the friends that surprise you with how much you ‘click’ when first meeting. The thing is, believing yourself to have no ‘true’ friends just because it didn’t happen in a scenario you want doesn’t mean you will never find that type of friendship. You definitely deserve to have a great companion(s) in your journey and will most definitely notice as you grow old that you had them, albeit different than how you wanted.
Have a nice day