What do you have in your mental toolbox for carrying on a conversation with someone you don’t know very well?

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1. Im no pro but here’s some ideas:

   – comment on their appearance (don’t be a creep or make them feel like they’re being “examined” though. Only works for specific contexts) for example, “oh shit are you bringing back the mullet? How long you been growing that out?” Or if they’re shirt says something interesting that would be a substantive opening line. Avoid commenting on their ethnicity (unless you’re super slick and can make it interesting without being offensive) or attractiveness (unless you’re both girls then you can be like “omg I love ur dress” and shit)
   – basically “what brings you here.” For example “who are you here with?” “Who else do you know here?”
   – comment on the environment you’re at. “This house is crazy.“ “I’m rocking with whoever’s on aux.”
   – if you’ve heard something cool about someone you just met, like say they just got a new job in the city, you can ask them about that.

   I find there’s two kinds of people: those who wanna just banter and have a lighthearted conversation, and those who wanna “get to know” the other person. Whichever both of you are feeling, you want to either get on the same wavelength or figure out you’re not on the same wavelength and cut the conversation off, of else one of you is just rambling about something the other doesn’t care about.

   Edit: another thing Im slowly learning is you want to build the other person up and make them feel validated instead of making potentially hurtful comments. For example recently I was introduced to someone because I was told we both went to Catholic school growing up, and my response was “damn I’m sorry to hear that” just because I didn’t like my experience. But I didn’t know anything about how she felt about Catholic school, maybe she liked it and she’s religious and I just offended her. I should have instead said something more positive