I really appreciate that he enjoys hanging out with me and I enjoy it too, but sometimes I just want to be at home.
He asked if we can go out and I said sorry I have stuff to fix in my apartment. He offered to fix it with me and but I said no worries I’m good. He then asked “How about at 9:00PM?” and I said I’d probably be sleeping as I’m very tired from work today (which I am).
He then asked “ok then 8:00pm?” I assume he knows I don’t want to hangout, but he keeps asking anyways until I have no excuses and I just have to say yes. It happens every time. I can’t say “no” without an excuse either because he’d just keep asking for an excuse. If I say something like I’m tired he always claims he had no sleep since last week or something.
2 comments
I think you have to sit down and talk to him about this. I feel he knows you don’t always want to hang out, but he also knows you’ll always give in at the end, and that just enables him to keep doing it. If he’s really your friend, then he’ll start respecting your boundaries a little more. If he gets all defensive or tries to gaslight you into thinking you’re the problem, consider cutting ties with this person
You can also just go with “no, sorry, I can’t” and refuse to elaborate further. Giving an excuse feels good because it “justifies” it but you don’t need justification and excuses open the door for solutions.