In my previous relationships, sex was pretty upfront. My partners were sexually developed and I was pretty satisfied.
My current SO is however a bit new to sex. We’ve been having sex for the last 3 years, but she’s still shy. She never thought of sex before or masturbated before she met me, I had to teach her a lot of things. When she gave her first BJ, she told me that she hated it. She began liking it more and more now(to the point where she asks for a 69 every time). I’ve tried talking to her about what she likes, but she mostly just says that she doesn’t really know. She told me that she likes to feel small but that’s all.
I do notice that she gets horny often when I do small things casually. I usually grope her boobs or ass and then she tells me she’s horny after a while (I wasn’t trying to make her feel horny). She mostly shows her ass off or pushes her boobs together, it looks more playful than trying to seduce me. We used to talk about having sex on the table and I used to eat her out on the staircase spontaneously.
The sex that we have is good, the only thing is that she cums really fast after we have foreplay. Penetration is difficult because she has vaginismus. She loves penetration, she usually cums really hard after a minute of penetration. But I would like her to ride me or to take her from behind, she is kind of scared to which I understand. I don’t mention it anymore.
I think that her sex drive is like mine, I like to have sex everyday, sometimes twice a day. The more I have sex, the more my sex drive increases (which I like). We had weekends that we didn’t have sex and I could see that she was sad and felt really guilty. A couple of weeks I decided not to initiate because I wanted to be approached. She told me that she was shocked that I didn’t want to have sex, which confused me.
I’d like to have a more sex dynamic between her and me, discover new things that we like and have sex more often. We did do those tests on what we like but considering that she had to ask me about what what was, it kinda defeats the purpose.
Can anyone give me some advice?