My gf was friends with her manager before she became a manager and we hung out a ton. It was a bit obvious she had a crush on me then. But nothing too major. But she used to keep saying that her and I are so similar and have a lot of fun when hanging out.
But since she has become my gf’s manager she is a bit more inappropriate. She will try to get more alone time with me, and if we are alone move to the couch next to me be cuddly.
Her husband is significantly older (early 40s) and she is complaining about how he leaves her alone at home all the time. She also says things like – “since you are fitter than him, you must be better in bed too”.
I don’t want anything to do with this, but I’m unsure how to do this since she is one of my gf’s best friends and manager
TL;DR My gf’s friend and manager keeps trying to hit on me and I want to make it stop.
22 comments
If it was me I’d go ahead and fuck her. I am a man after all, but it all depends on how well your woman and you get along.
Don’t be alone with her. Keep her at an arms length. Cheating takes 2…so don’t be the 1.
Tell your girlfriend.
Girlfriend’s manager No unless you want to lose the girlfriend and the girlfriend’s job at the same time in which case you will lose. Do not go fishing anywhere near the company pier. Stay away from her workspace.
Tell your girl now… tell her everything. It really is that simple.
Shut it down. Now. Tell your girlfriend her boss is not her friend.
You need to seriously stop hanging out with her. I don’t really get how at your age you keep finding yourself in a situation where you’re alone with her to where she can behave so inappropriate. Additionally, you need to tell your girlfriend she’s making you uncomfortable and you don’t want to be around her. I get it’s unfcomortable but do you even like your girlfriend? Why would you want her to be friend’s with such a snake? She’s literally not a friend to your girlfriend so there’s no benefit to salvage the relationship.
Have you had a candid conversation with your girlfriend?
Have you told that person that they’re making you very uncomfortable, want it stop and that you expect your boundaries respected?
If you have not done either, I recommend you get on that.
I’d also be super careful being alone with her. This seems like a super unsafe thing for you where she could easily lie even if you don’t do anything.
Tell your girlfriend that you will be absent when Flirty McManager is present.
You’ve talked to your GF about this I assume? Whats her response?
The easiest thing to do is tell the manager that her behavior is inappropriate. Say you don’t think its okay for her to be flirting like that and that it makes you uncomfortable. If that worsens your relationship with her then good. If she continues her behavior then tell your gf.
If your girlfriend is a very mature person, then you can just tell her about the situation first and then go on to tell the manager that her behavior is inappropriate.
Honey, her behavior is COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE AND ITS SEXUAL HARRASMENT. You need to talk to your gf and be COMPLETELY TRANSPARENT ABOUT EVERYTHING. She can speak to HR, have HR type down the incidents. That manager will get in trouble. But she needs to learn that behavior can land her being FIRED.
The fact that you haven’t told your girlfriend shows that maybe you enjoy this. Tell her now, and this will end.
See if she wants a 3some..
Please please please tell your gf!!! If this was happening to my bf, I’d want to know sooner rather than later. What she’s doing is absolutely sexual harassment and being honest by communicating what is happening to her is the best thing you can do. Like others have said, do not be alone with her and if for some reason you are and she makes these advances again, I think you need to confront her about how it makes you feel. I mean, she’s making you this uncomfortable, she deserves to be made uncomfortable by hearing your truth. I’m sorry this is happening to you, but your best bet atm is telling your gf what’s going on and decide how to handle it from there. Best of luck to you 🙏
I don’t think you really need all of us strangers advising you on this situation. Most issues are pretty gray – this one is only gray in one sense – will this girl, who is your gf’s boss, retaliate against your gf if you, for lack of a better phrase, set her straight.
Regardless, I think you know that you should:
(1) tell your gf about how you perceive the situation. There is a decent way to go about this. “Hey GF, your boss/friend has been making me feel very uncomfortable. I certainly don’t want to blow things out of proportion and it could simply be a miscommunication but I am really not comfortable being around her right now. I am even a little uncomfortable talking to you about this. Are you ok if I sit out outings w her for the foreseeable future?” When gf asks, and she will: give her the example about boss/friend talking to you about her husband vs you (fit vs not and the sex issue) NOT her straight up cuddliness w you. I would hope your gf would truly listen and hear everything but sometimes it’s easier to comprehend a story where you are the innocent bystander/comparison. Also if you truly have a good relationship with your gf and you trust her then you should be able to talk to her about this. If you are who you claim to be and she is too, she will listen to you and honestly be pissed, not on your behalf – sorry, but on her own behalf because her boss/friend is an ahole. I really think you need to talk to gf though because of that added boss layer. 🤷🤦
(2) address boss/friend directly: be very clear that you are not comfortable discussing certain things (like her husband vs your sexual virility 🙄) or that she seems to be crossing the line. I don’t actually suggest this approach because (a) it will most likely backfire on your gf (boss/friend will retaliate against her and she won’t have any idea why) and (b) boss/friend will more than likely deny all AND publicly condemn you for being so presumptuous. There also may be a (c) result aka boss/manager gets to gf and tells gf her own tall tale which probably will involve you coming on to her. Hopefully gf is awesome regardless and whatever path you choose ends w you both being fine but I think you are walking a very unfortunate slippery slope, man – girls are vicious (I know I am one). 🤞all works out
Firstly, tell your gf and give very clear examples. She can do what she wants with the information.
You should also ask your gf how she wants you to handle the situation going forward because you’ve tried to be polite factoring her job and this person’s position as her manager.
Secondly, you should tell this manager that you’ve told your gf about X, X and X example the next time she says something inappropriate. Make it clear that your gf knows and that these little jokes of hers aren’t going unnoticed, that you’re more than happy to keep gf informed of any further comments going forward.
At this point, you’re enabling managers behaviour by not enforcing a boundary here. Some people are too stupid to realise their behaviour makes them look foolish. This manager doesn’t know how dumb she looks right now.
Tell your girlfriend right away. Also, when she sits next to you, get up. If she says something inappropriate, like how good you must be in bed, straight up say, how inappropriate what she said was.
**Don’t be alone with this girl.**
If she’s trying this on you, she’s got no boundaries. Not worth any “false accusations”.
Just enjoy the extra attention and dont let it cross any boundaries lol
They aren’t your girlfriend’s friend though. Friends don’t do that. I would want to know so I could ditch them.