So I’ve been crying a lot since I found out my grandpa was dying. Two friends last week told me to get therapy because the crying is too much. I feel like I reacted this way when my other grandpa died too and they were there for me but don’t know if it’s just because I had a difficult year if this feels like too much for my friends to support me as it’s been one unfortunate event after another? I do think therapy is a good idea for me anyway but I feel sad that my emotions are overwhelming for my friends and like I’m a social failure that I am going to have to pay for support. Is crying everyday abnormal in this situation?
TLDR: My grandpa is dying – is crying everyday abnormal in this situation? Would you tell your friend to get therapy because of this?
9 comments
No it would be abnormal if you didn’t cry. You’re going through a natural reaction and part to grief
Not abnormal. And if your friends are good ones, they’re suggesting therapy because they understand that they aren’t skilled enough to provide support to their friend on their own. Grief is a complicated, terrible feeling, and a therapist who knows how to support people through it is a great idea. You’re not a social failure. You are simply grieving.
Therapy isn’t failure. Most people could benefit from it, to be honest.
Everyone deals with grief differently. You have a relationship with your grandfather and you are grieving a loved one, even if he is still around. I do think therapy is needed to help you cope with the situation. A professional knows what tools you need to improve your mental health. This is not something you can get from talking to your friends, who might feel bad that they cannot help you more.
It is not clear from your post whether your friends are “tired” of your crying. If they are, they are not great friends by telling you this. Especially since the things that are hurting you are out of your control. BUT If you feel like that’s how they feel, please don’t assume anything. You are emotional and fragile (understandably so). talk to them directly and see how they feel.
If you can afford to see a therapist, please do it. There is so much good that can come from that.
I wish you the best and the peace that you deserve.
You have every right to feel your feelings, if they are overwhelmed that’s on them. Therapy is always good too. But don’t feel ashamed about how you feel just cuz they can’t handle. Squeezes so sorry you are going through this.
People grieve in different ways, there’s nothing wrong. Therapy CAN be helpful for processing your emotions and is worth looking into, but there’s not a set amount of time you need to be finished by.
I think you are within the range of normal in your reaction- it’s just that your friends are tapping out because it’s too much for them deal with. They may be stressed about their own problems and not strong enough to take on yours right now
Doesn’t mean you’re abnormal- it’s just that a therapist could help you.
I wish I was more comfortable with emotions but I’m on the same page as your friends. Unless we’re taking about my kids lives, I would never break down in front of anyone other than my wife or possibly parents. Anytime I see friends or coworkers get emotional I get super uncomfortable. For better or worse I suffer in silence.
We cry when we are sad. It’s sad when we lose a loved one. Therapy is great but so is expressing emotions when you feel them. There’s nothing wrong with you crying.