I was trying to grow our relationships from 2014, he was passive and I was an active side in this question.
Now I feel totally nothing, we live together, his parents know me but I don’t love and don’t want him anymore. But he loves me now so our positions changed.
I am 30 , have no children, we have common business questions, it is difficult to go away and say- ok I don’t want you anymore , but I hate thinking about sex with him
35 comments
I feel old to begin a new relationships and I feel not confident at all
Same here
Sucks. But you know the right thing to do.
It’s just a decision you have to make. Not much we could help you with here. The good thing is there are no children involved, that complicates matters 100X
Have you talked to him about this ?
The security of comfort and familiarity is addictive enough that generations of our ancestors spent a long miserable existence in a soul sucking environment out of what was thought of as normal. It’s a new millennium, be odd!
Rip off the bandage and allow your self to find your happy. And free him up to find his. Or have the conversation of him allowing your relationship to be opened up so that you can get 5he dick down that you deserve as a lady, respectfully.
We are not responsible for emotions of other people and we shouldn’t be slaves to their emotions.
If there are no positive feelings in you, you should rather go.
People grown and change a lot, especially in our 20’s and 30’s you will find your groove with dating again, no point in stagnating in a miserable relationship that will go no where
You’re not married and have no children.
You don’t love him you say…
I think the only way breaking up with him is complicated is the fact that you have a shared business but you guys can talk about that and form some agreement.
He loves you now but trust he will get over you eventually if you break up since you both are still young.
If you wait longer he will start to resent you because eventually you are going to treat him badly because you don’t like him anymore. Spare both of you more hurt by sitting him down and being honest.
You may never fall in love again or maybe you will (who knows?) but imho, it is unfair to treat someone like they are just your option when to them you are everything. It is also unfair to yourself.
You both will be fine.
Both of you only have this one life. Don’t torture yourself and don’t torture him. You are still very young. The more you wait the more it will be difficult.
*You may want to tell him about this. It involves him.*
Thirty is really very young in the overall scheme of things. You have a lot of years ahead of you, and you have to decide what you want out of the rest of your life. It’s a tough decision.
Couples therapy is often recommended to see if there’s anything you can do together to work things out. It might still work, but sometimes it doesn’t. You have to think about what you want from your future. From experience, if love is gone, you end up alone emotionally anyway.
Is this a sex or relationship question?
Is this even a question?
Why does this feel like subtle marketing for OPs side hustle?
You should probably find someone you DO love
If that’s how you feel then you should just *cut to the quick* and end it. The faster and more decisively you do this, the better it will be for both you *and* him. Dragging it out with indecision will be the equivalent of cutting off a limb with a dull saw. Doing it quickly is the humane thing to do.
As to finding someone else, you may want to do yourself a favor and give yourself some time to go solo for a while. Discover who you are *now*. They don’t call them *rebound relationships* for nothing. If it’s sex you need, either invest in toys or get a FWB. You’re in your prime. You shouldn’t have any issues.
You are doing both yourself and him a disservice by staying with him. It will be hard but its for the best to move on if you feel this way.
A relationship will absolutely have its difficulties, but at its core, it should be a source of positivity in your life.
I am not sure if you do but I would recommend talking to someone!
My guess is that if you have been feeling this way, he may already *sense* it. I have been in that scenario before and it DOESN’T feel good… To suspect that the person you love is losing interest in you and there’s nothing you can do about it?
I held on to hope because of our history, but now when I look back, I wish I had just been told up front sooner.
Every moment you let the relationship drag out, you are putting him through more pain. Face your decision head on.
You don’t hav e boyfriend. You have a pet that you;re tired of now.
Karsh
Clearly you need to leave him. The business questions are a side issue.
Take the time to have several, many long discussions with him. Don’t pretend that things can be ok if they aren’t. This would hurt him even more, and do nothing positive for you. On a very fundamental level, your biological clock is ticking a whole lot louder than his is.
If the love is gone just quit .
You’ve already decided what you want. You dont want to hurt him but can you see yourself with him in 10 years regretting everything ?
The longer you wait, the harder it gets, why not tell him how you feel, you can end things mutually without him been hurt
SINCE 2014???
If you have been having these feeling for THAT long, that not fair to him either.
Break up.
If you hate him at this point then leave why are you gonna stay with someone you hate 😂
Have you discussed this with him yet? Because you post here smells like a prelude to ghosting him without warning. If he’s been good to you and doesn’t sense how you really feel about him, you owe it to him to let him know and see if there’s a way you two can work this out
It’s time. You know it’s time. Have the difficult conversation. You’ll be better for it.
/r/relationship_advice
Best to just dump him
Life’s too short to be unhappy.
No kids, not married. Why lead the man on any longer. Go separate ways now and let him find someone who wants to be with him.
Maybe you will realize you do love him once you let him go. Gotta leap sometimes.
The longer you wait, the more it will destroy you. Be honest with him, support him and don’t get mad or annoyed when he starts his grieving process. Try not to make it look so easy, even though you’re already over him. You will both eventually look back and realise it was the best decision. Goodluck
What changed since then? Why have the roles reversed after spending so much time trying to get him to love you? Do you envision yourself being to end the relationship in the near future in a relatively civil manner?
It’s not fair to either of you to prolong something that you know isn’t going to work, so as difficult as it might be, it has to happen soon. Do you think he knows or suspects the current situation?
Want to spend the next 50 years of your life with this man? If not then leave
If you want the best for him, beak up