how do you shake someone’s hand?

17 comments

1. Firm grip, maximum 2 pumps, look them in the eye

2. Electrocute em.

3. Everyone hates the dead fish grip. Makes me feel slimy after receiving one, like I just handled a wet dead fish carcass.

4. People shake hands still? I thought covid ended that.

5. Personally, I use a “snug” method.

   You stiffen your thumb and middle/ring fingers but don’t clench them tightly, two pumps, and look them in the eyes. This will throw off the game of a “crush your hand” type but not come off as too confrontational to either them or the “too loose” types.

   A handshake can be a sign of trust or sly display of dominance. Those who try to crush your hand are attempting to display their own strength and prowess by controlling your appendage, and being “snug” prevents them from doing so without being overly aggressive, a simple way of saying “I will not strike but I will not yield.”

6. Graps the hand with the strength you’d use on a door handle. Shake a maximum of twice. Break.

7. Make an “L” with your hand

   Make brief eye contact

   Then focus on meshing the webbing of your thumb and index with the same part of the other person’s hand.

   Land the grip, firm up, and make eye contact again

   Two pumps

   Pause

   Release

   Common mistakes

   – missing the grip – 9/10 you start squeezing too soon. If you land webbing on webbing your hand will naturally find the grip

   – grip too tight or too loose – this just take time to develop a feel for but you’re not trying to do a test of strength or flop like a dead fish. In general, too firm is better than too loose

   – too much / too little pump – it’s a feel thing, it just comes with time

   – too much / too little eye contact – you should be making confident eye contact but at the same time we’re not about to make out.

   In general, the junior person should take cues from the more senior person [including putting more effort into making sure the handshake lands]. If you’re of the same status, then just try to keep things casual.

8. If your penis comes out during the handshake something went wrong

9. I use the hand I last pounded off with.

10. With teeth

11. I adjust my balls first then pick my nose then shake 🤝🏻 hands

12. Firm grip, but not too tight, direct eye contact for two shakes.

13. Firm but not too firm.

    I do boxing so my grip can be pretty hard. Which I learned the hard way when I greeted two big-dog international professors in my field a few years back. I expected firm grip but they just placed their hands there.

14. 1. chop off someone’s hand
    2. put in a bag
    3. tie bag around my waist, bag facing to the back
    4. twerk
    5. done

15. Start straight. Once you grab their hand squeeze firmly, next twist your wrist bringing your hand above theirs. This is called “getting the upper hand” all the assholes think this a way of asserting dominance. Try it.

16. Oh good lord, there’s actually a wiki how for shaking hands. The tutorial crowd knows no bounds. How to stir a beverage noiselessly. Omg 😑

    Apparently there are 5 steps for method 1 of this less than a second encounter. I never knew it was a science, I just shook their hand and let go.

17. give hand, grab other person’d hand, shake once or twice, let go