How do I know if my husband has a breeding fetish?

34 comments

1. If you just leaned about it he prob doesn’t have it 😭.

2. You could ask him

3. Checking your previous post, he absolutely has a breeding/pregnancy kink

4. If he’s your husband you should be comfortable enough to just ask him

5. Can you do us both a favor? Ask him what he would do if your couldn’t have anymore kids . Would he stay or leave ? That tells you exactly where his mind is.

   How many kids does he want ? It is NOT fair of him to expect you to take care of 5 kids by yourself. And it’s not healthy having that many kids back to back .

6. You ask.

7. I didn’t think of that reading your other post but now that you said that it all clicks and I instantly remembered your post about not wanting to have so many tiny, needy children at one time.

   He has one, and more importantly he thinks that’s more important than what you want. It honestly sounds like you’d give this man as many kids as you could but need time to heal and focus on the little ones you already have before you add more. And that’s perfectly reasonable. It would be perfectly reasonable if you didn’t want any more children too, but I’m just trying to point out that it’s not about if this is his kink or not. The important thing is that you said your piece and his response was I believe you said, “Absolutely not” and that’s some bullshit for a human without a uterus to say.

8. Do you have sex more often while you are pregnant? If yes then he has else he dont

9. You could ask?

10. Even if he does, he may not be totally aware of it. I would have a conversation with him about it. Also take the advice of other commenters: ask him what if you couldn’t have anymore kids? Let me know the medical reasons your body needs a break.
    Be kind to yourself and take care of yourself first. You’ve made it abundantly clear what you need. No one else will take care of you besides yourself, and if you don’t care for yourself, it will be extremely hard to care for your children.
    Best of luck!!

11. Ask your husband if the idea of you putting a baby in him turns him on.

12. It just seems like your husband has unrealistic expectations from you, and you have encouraged that behavior my nodding your head and going all “I’m more than happy to provide for you.” (Literally your words in one of the comments)

    “We were the only child growing up, so it got lonely” is not a good enough reason to shoot out 3 kids in 3 years. It’s a stupid reason to begin with.

    For your sake, I hope you have a way to support yourself and your kids if shit goes down bad with this dude.

13. How are we supposed to know? Ask him

14. Yea. Reading your other post, it sounds like he might.

    Unfortunately, the breeding kink has been bastardized and many people when referring to it are really just saying they want raw sex. “Breed me” to a certain group of people just means “have sex with me without a condom” so it gets confusing because most of those people aren’t actually turned on by pregnancy. But if you look up things about a breeding kink in it’s true form, you might find that your hubby fits.

15. [deleted]

16. Ask him specifically if he has a breeding fetish.

17. OP you definitely need to consider talking to him. Communication is key.

18. ASK

19. I have some friends who have a breeding kink. They have 7 kids and she is a stay at home mum. They have 2-3 years between each kid except for the set of twins who are the youngest. They want to round it up to 8 which will mean that they’ve been “actively breeding” for 20 years.

    They’re super open about it and they’re safe, they try to make sure it’s an “ideal” gap between pregnancies so they can keep doing it. They also get off on the whole raising a baby thing and explained it to me that from when they start trying to when the kid stops breastfeeding is the exciting stage for them.

    I mean, it’s not for me and I made a joke one day which was when they straight up said yeah, we do. I mean, each to their own but it doesn’t sound like your husband has a lot of foresight. If he really gets off on the idea of getting you pregnant and having a big family, wouldn’t it make sense to stretch it out so your “active breeding period” is longer?

    Not to mention, you may have consented to having a large family but you didn’t consent to having dangerous, back to back pregnancies.

20. I think that men like cumming inside without a condom, to tell you the truth.
    This might deriving from the nature. we want to make kids through the sexual activity, not only to get pleasure.

21. Fetishes are often something that you may not be consciously aware of. You just know you like certain things but you may not realize it’s a fetish.

22. Ask him. This is the level of communication that you want in your marriage

23. You could start by asking him.

    Otherwise, don’t bring it up. If somehow the conversations continuously keep circling back to having more kids, it might be time to suggest couples therapy.

    If you are guys are together for the right reasons, and he’s not just using you for children, that is. Otherwise you might want to consider leaving. Have you considered the possibility he might be rushing having children in order to “trap” you into a relationship with him? It’s a very common tactic used by abusers

24. Wanting a lot of kids ≠ breeding fetish

    Sincerely, someone with a breeding kink who absolutely does not want to get pregnant at this moment in life and when I do, does not want more than 1 or 2 kids.

    Idk where so many other commenters get their knowledge on this kink or fetish. Wanting a large family is not synonymous to a breeding kink or fetish. Unless you talk to your husband and he says he gets off seeing you pregnant/inseminating you/etc then….dude just wants kids 🤷‍♀️ not every person who wants a large family has pervy intentions 😂 /lh

    All that said, i saw your other post and the guy has no respect for the toll pregnancy and subsequent rearing takes on your body and mind. Honestly if it were me, Id make my SO do one of those labour simulators so he could understand what he puts me through every damn time but im petty like that. I guess the more mature route is going to a ob-gyn and having them explain to your husband the ramifications of back to back pregnancies like this

25. He got you pregnant three times in a row and he can’t wait to do it again. He certainly does have a breeding fetish. He cares more about this fetish than he does about your health and your life

26. How to find out whether your husband has a breeding kink for dummies:

    You: Hey, Mr. Husband do you have a breeding kink? Mr. Husband: has to choose between

    1. Yes
    2. No
    3. Don’t know.

    Problem solved.

27. I immediately checked to make sure you’re the lady who posted in offmychest earlier lol. FR I hope you talk with your husband about this, the way he treats you is 100% unacceptable. You are a partner, not a breeding machine built to fulfill his fantasies.

28. I had to read that twice.

    Left field observation. I’d not say it’s a major kink as we are basically animals and sex is about – fundamentally – procreation.

    I’d call it an entry level ‘kink’. Personally – aside from when we were genuinely wanting children – it never crossed my mind. In fact quite the opposite. But on a fundamental level ‘getting off on creating pregnancy’ is low key.

    Kinks to me are triggers that make your arousal levels ‘elevated’ but aren’t mainstream.

    Kinks or the like are fine so long as it’s a two way thing and you’re not being ‘made to’ or ‘controlled’.

29. This is all very alarming. Don’t get more kids if you are not confortable with it. Let’s assume he got a breeding or pregnancy fetish. Then you have to figure out if he is only into the fantasy or if he needs the real deal.

    * If he is only into the fantasy it might be enough for him that you are on the pill and tell him how much you want to be bred by him during sex. If he is into a pregnancy fetish, I believe there are silicone bellys for it.
    * If he needs the real deal, you can’t let him have it. It would ruin your health physically and mentally. You need your health to provide for your children. I doubt hat he would stop this behavior, even after 5 childen. Let’s assume the worst, he might leave you when you reached the point where you don’t want any more children. Better stop having children now and find out how he put up with it, than finding out later and be left alone.

    Given that he already had three children with you and never questioned how you can cope with this rapid childbirthing and put his fetish aside, is not a good sign.

30. Ask?

31. Did you ask him?

32. You ask him

33. Your husband is a controlling abuser.

34. From the info you have given, he has a breeding fetish. He got with you, so was attracted to you, when you were pregnant. He has never been with you not pregnant or very recently having had a baby, and he is always planning on the next.