How much pre chat before asking about a date?

7 comments

1. I know you’re asking women but man, the answer to how much pre-chat, not much. A little chat to establish a little interest and go for the date. I hear on here all the time guys are like “I’ve been texting this girl for three weeks, now she’s ghosted me.” I ask, did you ask her on a date? “No, I didn’t want to come on too strong”….. well, shoulda asked her out sooner.

2. Chat for a few days- a week. And ask a girl out. Worked well for me in the past.

3. I would prefer to be asked pretty soon after the initial messaging. Texting too much can make you develop false intimacy.

4. I was chatting with a girl, asked her out the same day we matched on bumble. She accepts, I asked if she wanted to continue small talk before our date, and she says yes, to find out if I’m a weirdo. I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t agree to go out then until you established this right? Such a double standard when they mention the weird thing even though that is relevant for both parties lol. At least I got ghosted through text and not while on a date lol

5. Fwiw, I’ve found warming up to it is more important than any strict timing. Ask what they’re looking for in dating, then ask them something along the lines of what they like to do when they go out, and then offer a date that fits within both your interests

6. My last boyfriend matched with me and then opened with “hey we live pretty near each other. Want to meet for a coffee at the weekend?”, I said “sure why not” and two days later that was the start of things…

7. ask for her number after the first convo on the dating app then wait 3 days to a 5 days before asking her out.