What is the best way to handle finding a partner’s erotic magazine collection with tact?
It’s been a good two or three years since I found my long-term partner’s collection at their house.
I wasn’t snooping, just looking for a book or a magazine to read when I saw something with Japanese text on the spine.
I thought it might be manga which they also own some of but when I pulled it off the shelf (in their office closet, nothing super concealed!) the cover clearly indicated something different.
I put it back quickly since they were in the room and I didn’t want an awkward conversation.
I don’t mind if they watch or read that type of thing since I consume some porn myself.
I guess I wonder about bringing it up now for several reasons:
-i don’t want my partner to feel ashamed about it
-i don’t want them to hide it
-I’d like to explore reading it together
However I don’t know if bringing it up is a good idea. Quite frankly I’d be mortified if they brought up the stuff I’m interested in and I don’t want to put them through an uncomfortable moment.
Nonetheless the content of the magazine got me a bit excited and I did some more -ahem- research and found I enjoyed it a lot.
Should I tell them about what I saw or keep quiet and wait for them to bring it up? Ultimately I know it’s not really any of my business, again I don’t want them to feel uncomfortable. Or am I missing out on an opportunity to share something we might both like?
5 comments
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Normally I would say don’t bring it up. Not because of a fear or upsetting him or the sort but what is the point of doing so?
However…. You enjoyed it a lot. That’s fantastic. I would tell my partner if I stumbled onto something that really got me excited.
Porn in a relationship is always best when the couple looks at/watches it together. Porn can cause issues with trust and honesty and those are two very important and key things you need in a relationship. I recommend just being honest, and telling them you stumbled across it, adding that you enjoy porn and would like to watch it together rather than seperatly.
Are you dating a 60 year old from a rural state to hat has no internet?
“Quite frankly I’d be mortified if they brought up the stuff I’m interested in”
You’ve been together over three years and haven’t been able to discuss the things you are interested in?
You could start by just discussing porn in general, mention the type of stuff you like, including what you found. Ask if he has any interesting porn stuff around that you can look at together.