Recently became sexually actively how do I get better?

4 comments

1. Ask her what she likes, tell her to give you explicit instructions on what to do.

2. Want to know how to get better in bed? Become great at communicating. Asking the right questions and listening, knowing when to ask and when not to.

   Great communication is generally the engine behind the most amazing sex.

3. In my experience, giving pleasure during sex isn’t so much a matter of being “good” as it is about understanding what your particular partner wants and being able to give it to them. This can encompass everything from doing the sex acts they enjoy in a way they enjoy, to looking, talking and behaving in a way they find attractive.

   I can’t tell you what your partner will enjoy because I don’t know her, and you’d be better off trying to figure it out yourself: Ask her if there are any fantasies she’d like to explore; try some new stuff in bed and ask her how she likes it. Yes, there’s certain things you can do that generally tend to get a more positive response than others, but I think it’s always better to communicate with your partner rather than making assumptions.

   As a general recommendation, though: Wash yourself properly before the act, most people don’t enjoy sex with a dude that’s stinky. Eat properly and get eight hours of sleep beforehand, it’ll help with your stamina. If you can get away with it, stretch before the act — helps with cramping, especially if you’re more of an active partner.

   More than anything, relax and enjoy it. You’ve got a good thing going on, be happy about it and don’t fuzz over your performance too much.

4. Practice. Pay attention. Communication.

   Eta: do the dishes…etc.