Long story but worth the read, you might be the exact right person that can solve this puzzle called my life.
I’m a guy, have amazing social skills but only with guys, talking to girls make my brain stop working and make my heart pump twice faster.
Meanwhile my friend is just amazingly charming, girl’s come up to him to talk and he’s a bit popular around the college too.
Yesterday only I challenged him to go talk to a girl who we didn’t know, and today I saw him hanging out with that girl and piggy backing her, wtf dude, how?
So I got jealous and tried to talk to girls in my class today, the girl I sat with in the first period, I asked her name she answered, I asked where she was from and she answered again and then I asked her that we were in the same extra subject class and she went hmm, and then I said this class is so boring wanna play Tic Tac Toe and she just gave a angry look and ignored me for the rest of the day.
I was sad but I didn’t lose hope, in the next period I sat next to another girl, I chatted with her pretty well, she was smiling and talking and we were playing Tic Tac Toe and all, We had an amazing convo, well that’s what I thought, then I asked her if she wanted to sit together for the next period as well, we could chat more and play more Tic Tac Toe I said, and she replied with sure we will, and then I went out and when I returned to the class I sat with her started talking and making the Tic Tac Toe box, she looked towards me, stood up and went and sat with some other boy.
Oh boy! boom shattered my heart, you know why I was not affected by the first girl ignoring me but my heart was shattered by the second girl, because the second girl was my college crush, the girl i used to day dream about, I was so mad about her one day I sat for straight 3 hour’s just thinking of her lol, oh boy did my morale break, I sat alone in the last seat for the rest of the day.
And even though now it doesn’t hurt that much even though all my friend’s are talking about how my crush stood up and sat with another guy, I don’t care about it, but I do care about my inability to talk to women, my inability to walk up to a random girl and piggy back her the next day lol and My inability to have a nice conversation and not play damn Tic Tac Toe being a 21 year old adult man.
I hate this about me, I really want to make female friend’s, hang out with them, ask them how their day went, I get jealous when I see other guy’s hanging out with girl’s while I suffer and struggle, because growing up with sister’s I always feel safe being around women and opening up to them, even in school being the lead guitarist in my band I used to hangout with girl’s asking me to play their favourite song and stuff lol, and now in college it’s all gone, all my charm, charisma and confidence, please help me out
3 comments
Hey. Don’t beat yourself up. What you did talking to girls you barely know? Keep doing that. You didn’t hit on them, you didn’t say anything sexual. Just talk to them like you’d talk to a guy you don’t know. Just be relaxed and act like it doesn’t matter if you get a girls number. Because it doesnt matter.
Stop putting women on a pedestal. Go out and Genuinely connect with women in real life e.g. ask how they are, their hobbies, interests, goals, opinions, etc. Listen and pay attention to what they say. Share those things about yourself when asked. People also subconsciously attach you to the value you bring. The value you bring is a clear, unique, and convincing reason why people will interact with you, let alone do so constantly. So Find ways to add value to their lives. Having In person interactions is the easiest way to stand out from countless people who text or message. People remember and favor in person interactions because of the positive vibes. If your hobbies, skills, talents align with their interests or can help them, bring it up and offer to help them. Finally, learn how to be genuinely busy in your life pursuing your goals and hobbies, while interacting with people on the side. People are hardwired to be repulsed by neediness and desperation and instead gravitate towards those who are self confident and well rounded in life. They want to see active confirmation of you actually doing something in your life other than just talking to them. So chase excellence, not people.
Tic Tac Toe lmao