I’ve always wanted to have sex for ages and since I’m pretty young (18) I’ve only experienced it once for a minute. However in university people are crazy. I went to a student held event in an accommodation close by and every other pair was naked. I’ve never seen anything like it. Im wondering whether I made the correct decision by rejecting two guys who wanted to ‘share me’ on the night since I really want to experience sex more. Did I make the correct decision?
43 comments
Do what you feel comfortable with, do not be pressured into something you may not enjoy
If you weren’t comfortable then yes you did. You choose who you want to be with. You choose not them.
Yep.
Sex tends to be better with someone you trust and especially at the beginning it’s worth it to have someone with whom you can try around what you like best.
yeah, maybe.
If you are inexperienced maybe it’s better to go slow, just find one partner and experiment with him for the first times. Then when you know clearly what you enjoy you can go crazy.
In my opinion yes you did I am not a big fan with this idea especially with strangers and in events like that
If you didn’t feel comfortable at the time then yes you made the right decision for you. Maybe have some more 1v1 first and if you want to explore 2v1 later then for for it. Not everyone wants to do a threesome so don’t stress over it :).
You did the right decision, not only do many guys find women who have a history of threesomes as unattractive when it comes to relationships but these guys clearly just view you as a sex object.
It could of also been dangerous, Dont give out your pussy too easily. Only have sex with men who actually like you and want a relationship
I’d say you did it could’ve been a traumatising experience since your inexperienced and young and ruin other sexual encounters
Tou definitely did the right thing, coming for a (M) they might have taken advantage and ruined something that is meant to be special
You did the right thing by declining. If you’re wanting to experience sex more, do it around people you know and trust, threesomes included. College is that time where you can break out, I certainly did.
Even had my first threesome there, but not with people I just met at an event. It was a guy and his girlfriend, sophomore year. I knew them both well, was comfortable in my sexuality, and wanted to try it out. We had a good time, remain friends, and they’re happily married expecting their second kid.
Just remember, experience anything sexual with people you know. Not random strangers. Or, if you were wanting to try out a random sexual experience, just start off slow. Go on a date, get to know the individuals, then go and enjoy yourself.
Given your experience I think this was the appropriate move.
No
YES, do only what you want and only with who you want.
You are still young.You’ll gonna have time to do it with people you know and trust. Don’t pressure yourself.
Better to know and feel safe with people you will do that with, at least one of the people, otherwise it could get out of hand. Better to be safe than sorry.
U just saved yourself from getting traumatized.
Student dorms and parties like this are a nice way of getting STD. Not only is it a right decision, but a smart one.
Yes, don’t have your first time be with two complete strangers who don’t know you or possibly respect you as a person.
Yes.
Good sex happens when you feel safe and comfortable and relaxed.
If it doesn’t feel like that it’s a really good idea to walk away.
If you’re a young woman at university I really wouldn’t worry about getting enough chances to experience sex haha.
I’d say yes. I don’t trust guys in college when it comes to things like threesomes unless I know them well. A lot of guys will then spread the word that they “spit roasted” or “ran the train” on you and people will then look at you funny behind it. You definitely made the right choice. Nothing wrong with threesomes, you just need to know the people involved are mature enough to handle it and won’t tell people after the fact to boost their ego
You might have avoided an STD or an upsetting experience. It was the right choice
Real sex is intimate with a partner who respects you and has affection for you.
Unless you’re into threesomes, you were right to reject it. You are not in a porn film … Pretty sure those 2 guys had that in mind more than your intimacy.
You’re 18. It can wait for someone you really connect with. If you’re really horny, find someone you like who can respect you and have a nice intimate evening together. Don’t forget the condoms.
I turned down a few, regret it now I’m older and it won’t happen (or it it did would not be the same)
Yes
It sounds like you dodged a potentially horrible situation…two strangers “sharing you” like a chicken dinner doesn’t sound like a recipe for a good time, and could very easily get out of control. You knew your boundaries and that’s great – always, always, always trust your gut.
If you dont want it dont do it. Always remember, dont give in when it comes to sex, career, money and pretty much everything in life
An attractive young woman will have no end of opportunities for sex. You will remember your first time for the rest of your life so make it a pleasant memory. Apparently, getting spit-roasted by two randos wasn’t the experience you were aching to have.
Your first instinct in these things is usually correct.
There will always be another 3some.
If you weren’t comfortable, you weren’t comfortable or ready.
Maybe next time you will be. And if not, its still OK
Yeah, two 18-year-old college dudes you’ve never met probably wouldn’t have been a great first real sexual experience. They were probably a lot more likely to get off on using and degrading you and/or their own latent homosexual urges for each other than on prioritizing your pleasure.
I (40f) have always enjoyed group sex. Especially mfm. I’d had several experiences with it by the time I was your age and it was always super fun. I think you should jump at any experience like that if it sounds fun and you’re into the people involved. That said, if it didn’t feel right in the moment, then you made the right decision. There will be plenty of other opportunities. Don’t worry about what other people might think about it or want you to do. Trust you gut. Threesomes are a lot of fun and mfm’s are my favorite. But you have to really want that sort of experience.
Can’t say, it all depends on the type of person you are and what you enjoy
If that was your decision, then it was the correct one.
Just because you are doubting tells me you made the right decision. Don’t worry. You are 18. You’ll get plenty of other opportunities.
The best thing for you would be to get a boyfriend or friends with benefits situation. Sex and experimenting with sex is waaaay better and safer with someone you trust. Stay away from orgy scenes and orgy people for a while. The sex positive scenes like that are filled with horrible predators.
I have not had sex of any kind in 3+ years so I am not qualified to comment…..
Get more experience. Figure out what you like and what you don’t like and how to set boundaries.
Then there should be plenty of opportunities to explore…
Having “flings” or “casual sex” can be fun, for sure. But if you’re looking for that special kind of sex, then finding someone you deeply care for is necessary.
yes u did
When it comes to sex if your gut instinct says ‘no’ then you stick to it
Likely. Trust your gut.
Definitely would recommend just starting with vanilla sex before you jump into multiple partners and so on. Download tinder or any dating app and find someone you get along with to experiment.
Of course. If you’re not comfortable with something, don’t do it. You absolutely made the right decision. There are other ways to experience sex. It’s fine that a threesome wasn’t the way you wanted to do that!
No. You did the right thing for you. 3somes are not all that great. Especially MMF ones. Or are you male?