Fear of talking about myself+no one caring what I say when I do

I can usually hold conversations pretty well because I like people, I’m curious and ask a lot of questions. Have no problem talking about them, similar interests, things around us.

But the problem is I get terrified to talk about myself, my opinions on things, likes, plans/dreams, emotions, etc. I’m very aware of how long I’m talking for and afraid of saying too much or hogging the conversation as I’ve been on the receiving end so many times. There’s many times I overshared and regretted it and I fear over sharing a lot.

Thing is, I’ve had an underlying belief since young that no one cares about what I have to say or about me, and it’s constantly reinforced because….so many people don’t care?

Now I am not putting full blame on others here. I know I can probably turn the tables, but SO many people I talk to are “conversational narcissists”. They never ask questions or go deeper on anything you say, don’t listen as you’re speaking and it’s obvious, sometimes cut you off or only respond to things you say with things about themselves.

I’ve just had so many interactions and even relationships like that. I actually enjoy talking very much but Ive come to just shut down and shut myself up when this happens and in anticipation of it happening. As a result I am afraid to hold ground in conversation, and I lose conviction in my voice. I trail off into mumbling sometimes, water down my opinions, and quickly turn the topic back to them. This is probably a cycle where my lack of conviction and speaking adds to people not listening/caring, and in turn them not caring adds to my fear.

I also feel it’s hard to build deep relationships because I’m rarely vulnerable and don’t open up about myself. I know a lot about other people but they don’t know anything about me.

Has anyone else struggled with this? Should I seek out people who are better listeners or show ability to be interested in another person? Because It really fucks w my self esteem talking at length with people who just talk at me about themselves and anything I say goes out their other ear. This reinforces my deep seated beliefs that I’m trying to change.

Or should I be trying to insert myself more and talk about what I think and stuff for longer? And learn to talk and not care that others don’t care? I fear this is a highly annoying trait and I don’t want to become a conversational narcissist myself. I hate being vulnerable or talking about myself or even my thoughts and people not caring.

Not sure what way is best to approach working on this.