Throwaway account of course. So I am still a virgin, I’m 19 and I have a vibrator that I use occasionally. Of course with lube. It’s good quality from a well known sex shop but pretty big and it hurts if I try to penetrate myself, I can’t even get it in because it just feels so weirdly uncomfortable. The same goes for fingers and even tampons, it’s just… weird and uncomfortable. Is that normal or is it some kind of condition? I heard of vaginismus and I’m kinda scared tbh. I’m sorry if this is not the right place to post but I’m honestly just scared
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My gf and I thought she could’ve had something like vaginismus as well for the same reasons. Fast forward a few months of slowly using fingers and so on, one day she was just fine. Everything was the way it should be. It could simply be becuz you’ve never done it. Just be extra careful when it comes to actually having sex cuz some people won’t think twice and just full send it without a thought lmao
Definitely relax…. Try and have a clitoral orgasm first. If it’s still painful, talk to your Dr… It may be vaginismus or something else. Just take your time. Maybe get a smaller toy if it’s too big.
Just go see a physio- if it is vaginismus it is treatable
I had vaginismus and put off treatment for years. Once I actually went and did it, it was fine and now it’s not a problem – but I do want to say (obv not to freak you out) that treatment does not work for everyone. It’s important to find a doctor you feel comfortable with (I had an excellent physio) and also a psychologist or therapist to talk you through the emotional side of things. I’m very happy to share my experiences if you ever want to chat. It can be very lonely and scary, but support is available ❤️
Read this: https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/painful-intercourse/symptoms-causes/syc-20375967#:~:text=Causes%20include%3A,adenomyosis%2C%20hemorrhoids%20and%20ovarian%20cysts.
It’s not supposed to hurt, but that isn’t inherently a cause for concern. It helps a lot to be aroused, use smaller implements, and make sure to use some kind of lubricant. There is a reason they sell lube next to the tampons.
Arousal is particularly important. Penetration is generally always going to be uncomfortable if you are not aroused. For solo activities this means finding what works for you, whether it be just imagining things, reading erotica or romance, or yes watching porn which is a normal thing women do.
If you’re able to contemplate having a “pretty big” vibrator inside you, and you can fit fingers and tampons in, then you probably don’t have vaginismus. Try buying a smaller model and see how that goes for you. It’s great that you’re exploring and finding out what pleases you.
Don’t be scared – sex is good, sex is fun. If you do run into trouble you can and should consult a doctor. For now it sounds mainly as if you are getting used to things. Don’t worry and have a happy and rewarding sex life!!
Not a virgin but had the same experience recently. Very uncomfortable. My best guess was somewhere inside me was scratched so that it hurt so badly that even when my body had to produce a whole lot of water down there it didn’t get any better. Most of the time I had to pretend that I was enjoying (I tried, but I couldn’t). The sex turned out to be a nightmare ugh…
It shouldn’t hurt if you’re lubricated and aroused. Practice with fingers before a toy and push in very gradually. Practice daily and you should be more prepared for sex.
It definitely is not _supposed_ to hurt, but it’s normal if it does during the first times when you’re still getting used to being penetrated. It really is a process for some people, especially if you naturally have a thicker hymen or a particularly tight vagina that isn’t used to penetration. My advice is to start with something smaller and work your way up to something thicker when it starts feeling good and your body has adapted.
I know that some women have issues with becoming wet for different reasons such as hormonal birth control, but it’s also possible you simply weren’t aroused enough for comfortable penetration. I mean you said you used lube so i’m assuming you weren’t that wet yourself? The vagina expands and gets deeper when you are aroused, so it’s no surpise it felt uncomfortable if your body wasn’t ready.
Gay guy here, only if your top is doing it wrong, if it hurts he’s just going in there wham bam thank you mam without considering as to whether you are comfortable.
Slowly ease the dick into yourself with plenty of lube, then the two of you can have some fun.
Before my wife and I started having sex, she could barely fit one finger in there. And couldn’t use tampons. I think for her it was just the weirdness of not being totally comfortable with that area of her body.
You’re overthinking it . Start small and work your way up to what you feel comfortable with.
Being in the right frame of mind helps to, don’t try because you “think” you should but do it when you’re feeling turned on and sexually aroused ( watch some erotica or read , whatever works for you?)
But mainly it relax and take your time