I have a super extroverted friend, and he is organizing a surprise party for a mutual friend. He Invited me along with like 5 “cool kids” that I dont really like (because most of them vape or smoke all the time).
Im a semi introvert and can be super awkward at times. I decided to go because I rarely get invited to places and this could be my chance to gain some good reputation so I get invited to stuff more often.
I feel like theres one guy there that doesn’t like me too much and would start questioning who invited me.
Also my crush is gonna be there, so thats also a reason. I really don’t know how Im supposed to act, so any advice is appreciated.
3 comments
Practice your party persona. It’s a little bit like a low-key performance and everyone does it in social gatherings. I tend to get very smiley and talkative and laugh at other people’s jokes, even if I don’t know them. Even if you just listen, smile more than usual, laugh at a few jokes, and ask a few questions that show interest in other people, you will do great. Take it slow and think of it like practicing for an important life skill that many people never get good at. It’s USEFUL.
My Dad used to tell me that if I ever see a fin swimming towards me in the ocean, to swim towards it and show that fuck who is boss……ask your crush out, who gives a shit what others think.
and that first peice of advice, don’t do it lol
So as natural ambiverts/introverts, doing well in social situations is a learning curve. (I’m nearly double your age, definitely A LOT less awkward than I used to be, but still a ways to go).
But fundamentally, keep your head in a positive space. You might get anxious about “oh god I’m being boring” or “that was weird they’ll hate me” or “fuck that joke didn’t click I’m bombing this”. Trust me, no one is scrutinizing you that well, and no one will remember a silly goof-up in a couple of minutes.
So just try to feel like you belong there. Make yourself comfortable “in the space”, just try to “want to have a good time”, stay upbeat/positive. If someone’s poking fun at you, confidently laugh it off. Have opinions on topics (if someone likes or hates pineapples, they’re interesting, but someone who has no opinions on pineapples is boring).
If the conversation is about topics you understand, express opinions enthusiastically. If it’s about topics you don’t understand, act interested and curious. If someone says “I did X” and you say “oh that’s pretty cool” and they think of you as a cool person, they’ll appreciate the fact that a cool-looking person thinks they’re cool. But keep it sincere, don’t suck up to anyone.
Honestly, socializing as an introvert/ambivert is having an arsenal of tricks like these. But you’ll be pleasantly shocked by how effective they are as you get better at using them.