The girl I’m currently seeing loves dirty talk and it’s not that I’m not cool with it, I’m just very inexperienced and it really doesn’t do anything for me. While having sex she’ll say something like “tell me what you like” (referring to her. Ex: I like your pussy, how youre grinding on my dick, etc.) and I just sort of blank. After our last session she asked why I’m always so quiet so I can see it’s something she really wants.
I have no problem doing it, especially if it’s something she wants, but honestly don’t know where to start. So I guess what I’m sort of looking for is some type of “dirty talk for beginners” advice on things I can say.
I have to admit, I’m a bit hesitant to say things sometimes because I don’t know if she’ll find it hot or not. I once said “good girl” and she laughed at it so now I’m a bit scared. The last thing I want to do is ruin the mood.
She also said she likes praise kinks and words of affirmation if that helps.
Thanks in advance.
7 comments
i don’t think “tell me what you like” is dirty talk lol
I would be a bit unsure in that situation too, since she likes praise kinks, but laughed at good girl which is right up that alley. Just flat out ask her (not during sex) what kind of dirty talk she likes, and share examples, because it’s going to differ dramatically from person to person. It’s always going to be a bit awkward to someone who hasn’t done it before, that’s just natural. Having an open discussion about it can help ease your mind about saying the wrong thing.
Even after 12 years my husband feels a bit awkward with dirty talk. However if he has a drink or two, he gets into it like a pro 😅
Yeah I think it makes total sense you feel shy around this, I mean her asking you to talk dirty and then laughing at what you say is a really shitty move and a pretty big red flag.
In general I think one good approach is to talk to her about it when you aren’t having sex. Ask her what she means by it, to give some examples, why she likes it, try out some lines and see if she likes them etc.
Talking about sex when you’re not having it is one of the main tricks to having amazing sex.
And then yeah also you can practice on your own. So just imagine a situation you’re in and start talking dirty, with practice it will become more fluid.
Generally you just want to describe what is happening, what you’re thinking and feeling etc. And yeah it’ll probably feel really weird and awkward at first, that’s fine, there’s a lot of social taboos around it. But yeah once you’re into it really it’s just like talking about anything else.
The easiest way to start to dirty talk is to commentate. It’s basic but it works and it will open the door for more creative stuff. Narrate what’s happening. Be breathy with it. Have attitude about it. Use the dirty words for stuff. Throw a bunch of “fuck” and “fucking” in there. Sometimes make it question. You have to own it.
* Look at you sucking that cock.
* I love hearing your slurp while you suck me.
* Yeah. You like that cock down your throat?
* You like tasting this cock?
* Your pussy tastes so good.
* You’re so wet.
* You getting on top? You gonna ride this cock?
* Your tits are bouncing all over the place.
* You like being fucked in the living room?
* You like your neighbors hearing you get fucked?
* Yeah, I’ve got your ankles around my neck.
* Is that pussy squirting? You squirting on this cock?
* Yeah I’m fucking you like a little slut.
* Fuck, I’m pounding your ass.
* You like when I pull your hair like this?
* You’re gonna make me cum.
* I’m gonna cum inside you.
After while, you’ll learn how to escalate from naughty to fucking filthy and what words are preferred and appropriate versus what words are completely off limits. Maybe she prefers “dick” instead of “cock”. Maybe she prefers “cunt” instead of “pussy”. Maybe she likes being called a slut when you’re both going hard but ONLY in those moments. Also, you’ll learn to start suggesting things and being daring with the questions.
* I need to be inside you.
* When we get home I’m going to peel your fucking clothes off the second we get through the door.
* I’m going to bend you over the couch and fuck you like a little slut.
* I’m going pin your arms back and fuck you in front of the window.
* You want me to fill your mouth with cum?
* When I pick you up, we’re going to drive out to the river and I’m going to fuck you in the passenger seat in the back of the parking lot… and I want you to be loud, baby.
* I want you to taste your pussy when you kiss me.
* I want you to go to work tomorrow tender as hell and still feeling me leaking out of you.
Start narrating. Over time, get more creative. Never say you’re going to do something that you don’t plan on doing. She needs to know that when you say something, it’s going to happen. Have fun with it.
^(Edit. Grammar.)
What not to do:
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1y6lhe/what_is_the_worst_thing_someone_has_said_to_you/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Owe go for it dirty talk is good like I’m going fuck you so hard and then cum in your pussy. You can say eat my cunt till I say stop.
I mean, you need to ask her what she means by that.
“Dirty talk” can take many forms. You mentioned she laughed at “good girl” so she might not like that type of praise or pet names, but does she want you to talk about her body? Does she want you to describe what your going to do to her? Or does she want to be teased? Does she want to be degraded?
She is giving you NOTHING. She needs to say what she wants and you can go from there.