I was out and about the other day, and chatted this lady up. I felt like we flowed pretty well and she seemed like she enjoyed talking to me, so I offered that we meet again. She said “yeah” pretty readily, so I asked for her number and I texted her my name so she’d have my number.
I left, and about 20 mins later she sends me an apologetic text saying that she has a boyfriend. I tell her it’s all good, no harm done, and that was the end of it. I could tell she felt bad and was obviously doing damage control, but I’m kind of curious as to why she didn’t just say that initially. Maybe it was just a mistake (to which I’d say, fair enough), but I’m wondering if there was something about our interaction that made her feel uncomfortable with declining.
11 comments
Some women feel awkward turning someone down in person if they’re a nice person or they’ve had experiences with guys who take “no” pretty badly and make a scene.
As long as you feel like you didn’t badger this woman into eventually taking your number, I wouldn’t think too far into it, it happens.
She was scared you’d escalate. Nothing personal, probably bad experience.
some men can go from “oh my god you like puzzles? that’s so nerdy! i love puzzles!” to “fine bitch, you’re too fat for me anyway!” in like 5 seconds and eventually you get really good at discerning who will and will not behave like that before it escalates, but some women don’t have as much experience or don’t quite trust their radar yet. definitely doesn’t mean you did anything wrong!!
Maybe she does have a boyfriend and was in a vulnerable place, accepted your advance, then felt bad.
Maybe she doesn’t have a boyfriend, enjoyed the attention, and regretted giving you her number after.
Either way, you charmed a woman. Good job!
She was scared of what you would do if she turned you down in person.
She wasn’t interested in any case and probably took your number to end the interaction quickly and move on with her day. You didn’t necessarily do anything wrong just don’t overthink it
Safer to let you know the way she did
It’s funny when I got rejected as a kid it was always my boyfriend’s in another country like Australia or New Zealand or somewhere far away lol . So for me and imaginary boyfriend in a far off country was a better option than me lol 🤣🤣🤣🤣.
There are a lot of guys who can’t handle rejection and take their frustrations out on women. She probably assumed you were one of them. Don’t take it personally
Who in the hell could possibly answer if there’s something about your interaction that made her uncomfortable? Reddit can’t answer that, only she can.
She might have just wanted to avoid any pushback or was enjoying the flirting and you made it real, so she shot it down.
Why even give it any thought? Just move on.
I’d text her one last time – ” it was great meeting you. If you find yourself single in the future feel free to reach out.” Don’t message her anymore. Who knows what the future will bring. Good for you for getting her number!