I had triplets 10 months ago by c-section. My husband has complained about me to me this whole time saying: (1) “You’re kind of lazy” when I’ve been alone with the triplets.
(2) “Ugh, my wife is a-sexual” because the iud I’ve had put in has not regulated yet, but I got it because he doesn’t want to use protection or get a vasectomy. So I’m bleeding off and on more than normal.
(3) “You do the same shit all the time” when I was making our older sons lunch because he didn’t want the school lunch that was provided today. I gave him a sandwich, chips, and blueberries. I didn’t think that was crazy. We already had everything to make it.
I take my pills, I go to a therapist, and I was working but he didn’t like that job so I quit and I’m trying to find another one that lets me work while I have kids and need to create my own schedule. This was kind of a rant but if you have a remote job that I could do with the conditions I have that would be great. Thanks in advance!
40 comments
Your husband sounds terrible.
You know how to tell if someone is a narcissist?
You have to constantly ask yourself if they are that stupid or just that much of an asshole.
People completely removed from parenting might think it easy. Make something you have to do on a weekend and leave him with the kids he’ll learn or youll learn he’s just a jerk.
The correct response when someone makes you lunch is thank you.
Your husband sounds like an insensitive jerk.
I’m sorry, OP but your husband sounds really awful. I’m getting abuser vibes.
I really feel for you. If you would like any resources for your own well being, I’m happy to share them.
Wow he sounds so controlling. It seems like it’s always HIS way.
I would reconsider this relationship.
His a Fool…
you would be correct, your husband is an idiot, and a bad partner. you are not crazy, you are not lazy.
He doesn’t sound like an idiot, he sounds mean and demanding and unsympathetic.
I cannot imagine handling triplet – particularly on your own, let alone another kid, household, job.
I would suggest couples therapy if he is willing to go and make an effort to improving the relationship. Otherwise worth examining if this is a sustainable situation for you.
You had triplets! AND an older child. HE has a problem, by marriage his problem is your problem. What’s your therapists take on this? I don’t have any answers but I wish you the best of luck.
I’d love to hear what your therapist thinks about this
Don’t ask yourself if he is an idiot, ask yourself if he is worth the trouble.
He sounds worthless as a husband and father. Are you with him because you need to be or because you want to be?
If it’s the first, start planning now for the inevitable. How ever long it takes. Start planning.
If the 2nd, then it’s time to figure out what needs to be done for his attitude to change. Have a talk with him. Let him know that something has to change.
What would his reaction be if you suggested he take some of the burden off of you? He can pack some lunches or do extra for the triplets. Or give your body a break post birth.
Would his reaction be angry or filled to the brim with excuses? Maybe twist the whole thing and have you apologizing at the end?
If any of that is true, there’s a major problem with how he treats you. Because I already know how he speaks to you is rude.
Yup, he’s the idiot.
1. Leave for a week and let your husband deal with everything himself.
What a selfish, horrible partner. Please let him stay home with the kids for an entire day so he can see what it’s like.
Please do not let this man cut you off from making your own money. That’s how you will get stuck.
No matter how frustrated I am with my wife, I’ve never said such things to her. If she talked to me that way, I would be done.
What an asshole. Let me guess, he does absolutely nothing to help with *his* kids. And if you push him to do anything he complains the whole time?
What a waste of oxygen.
I suggest taking an entire day for yourself. No husband, no kids. Leave your husband to care for the kids for the day. *Alone.*
Think he might dump the kids on his mom? Pick her up in the morning and make her spend the day with you! Don’t let her leave to “rescue” him. Invite anyone you might think he’ll dump the kids on. *Force* him to see what you do *every day*. I promise the kids will be fine.
See if he changes his tune about being “lazy” after caring for triplets with zero help.
If he doesn’t he’s a sociopath. And it’s never gonna get better.
P.s. I’m sending you a pm about a job.
I think your husband is mean and selfish. Get a new job and lose the terrible husband.
I hope your therapist is telling you to leave this smuck. He sounds like a jerk.
This doesn’t sound like someone to have or raise children with. He sounds terrible tbh.
Oh my good lord. Good luck to you. You absolutely have more patience than I do. What is he doing for you?!!!!!!!!
What a jerk.
Good lord, my wife went through a c-section followed by a hematoma when healing (seeping through the c-section wound which I had to clean every few hours), then a hernia operation, in which the surgeon had to reopen her up because laparoscopic surgery wasn’t going to fix it, then another hematoma on-top of that when healing.
My son was over a year old before my wife healed up fully (18m now).
Your husband, at the very least, is an insensitive asshole who needs to get over himself, pull up his big boy pants, and try going through what you just did.
Your husband sounds like a piece of shit.
You are married to a complete and total AHole. I am so sorry that you are in this position. You don’t sound like you get any support
How involved is he with the kids?
Would you say he is a responsible, loving parent who contributes a fair share of effort?
Why did he make you quit your job?
Do you feel like an equal in your partnership?
I am full of rage on your behalf. Husband is major trashbag, I’m so sorry
If I had newborn triplets, the other kid would survive on school lunches!
😄
You’re awesome ❤️
He’s not an idiot, idiots don’t function because they’re stupid. This is not caring. He doesn’t understand you because he doesn’t care enough to.
There are some 1099 make your own schedule jobs omniinteractions is a good one.
He’s not only an idiot, he’s a fucking asshole. I hope you find it in you to leave this POS.
OP, not sure if this is on your radar, but PLEASE do not join any type of MLM scheme! They prey on folks like you, looking for a bit something of your own, work from home, flexible schedule, side cash, etc. They are almost always terrible wastes of money. Please do NOT join any job or role that requires you to buy inventory, fill in sales quotas with your own money or recruit new members to work under you. Also maybe read your post here verbatim to your therapist.
Wow, like how many people do you have to give energy to and when will you have a partner that gives you energy that you totally deserve?
Like kids, rightfully need to be raised, you’re husband already from should be
You don’t need a new job. You need a new husband. Good luck leaving. You can do it.
Why are you with this man? He sounds like a giant piece of shit. BTW, I know a single parent of triplets. She had to leave. She’s doing amazingly well and is thriving, though it’s not been easy. You can do this.
Triplets. And you’re lazy? Umm no.
Making him lunch… anything but thank you should go right back to his mouth.
Fuck that noise. FYI I’m a 38M with 4 kids and have a wife who stays at home.
Want to know what I “ask” of her? Nothing, she’s my partner and free to do as little or as much as she please.
If I have an issue with something then I can get off of MY ass and take care of it.
I’m very Greatful she does ALOT, but I’m not going to allow her to shoulder the load alone.
I see shes tired? Time to relax I got it beautiful.
Again, lazy with triplets ???? That’s just dumb.
Honestly anyone who tells someone with triplets that they’re lazy, has some crazy unrealistic expectations….the audacity. Kids are no joke. Do yourself a favor and go find DiaryOfAnHonestMom on Instagram or TikTok
Onlya few months after giving life to 3 beautiful babies and he’s ranting at you. Wow how selfish can a man get. Sometimes I wish every man on earth had to carry and birth 1 baby then lets see how they would react when given the treatment? I wonder 🤔