As a guy I love seeing my girlfriend turned on, gripping the sheets etc. The more she’s enjoying it the more I do. I’m asking this question though because me and my girlfriend where talking about past sex we’ve had she said she’s been with 4 guys before me and none of them really made her cum until me and apparently sometimes I’ve made her orgasm multiple times
I always finger her and do foreplay before hand which might help and I usually last 10-20 minutes do some guys just not try or do they not care? I don’t understand because every girl I’ve been with I always try to make them cum too because I feel like a shitty sex partner if I don’t plus I enjoy it.
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(51F) As a woman, I want to say “THANK YOU”❣️
I don’t understand why either. I’m like you, the more she’s enjoying it the more I’m enjoying it. Enjoy it as much as your lovers will.
Because they are selfish, shitty lovers – likely indicating that they are selfish, shitty human beings.
What makes me shake my head is that they are just idiots on top of it. From a purely selfish perspective, it usually pays off for a man to get his partner off. If you do so, she’s likely more sensitive, more responsive, and sex is better for both of you.
But they won’t listen.
I had a boyfriend who said all the girls he slept with before me lay there like sacks of potatoes. I couldn’t quite understand what he meant at first, as I’m, ahem, extremely active, inside and out. It never occurred to me not to be. But apparently some people just don’t try!
Why are some people selfish? What are some people assholes? It is just in their nature.
But, you also hit the nail on the head with the last three words of your post.
YOU enjoy giving pleasure.
I like to think that I am a good husband and a good partner. But, a huge reason that I like to give my wife orgasms is because I love to see her orgasming.
It’s quite the existential crisis. Ha ha.
Like you I get more pleasure from pleasuring my partners than from having an orgasm myself. Simply put, I like to fuck. I try to get through the first few orgasms via oral or fingers, and then at least a few more before I cum. I am literally disappointed in myself if she has less than 4 before I do. BUT… I always make up for it on the second round. 😜
My dear, if I had relied on men to show me what an orgasm was, I would still be waiting to experience one.
About 70% of my partners never did anything but make out and PIV. I’ve had so many partners who thought women climaxed in the 3 minutes of in-and-out that they manage, many never touched a clitoris, many never heard of a clitoris. I’ve been with 3 people who knew how to give a woman an orgasm out of numerous partners (I came of age in the hippie days.)
I have always wondered, if men want sex so much, why aren’t they better at it? Why don’t they study about it and learn how to please their partner? Granted, not all men, and I think men are better informed these days, but, geez, those old days were frustrating.
As a person who gets off only when their partner gets off, I don’t get it either.
You are a good man. If anything it should be 50/50 but some men take it to the extreme and almost never take care of their ladies first. That, is not good. Throw the flag!!!!!!
My ex hated fore play and he’d just get to it and finish and then that would be it. We were together for a long time and I’d try to communicate to him that I needed more but he did not care and, well, he’s an ex so I’m good now.
Next time jus say ( with a sigh ) thanks… I gotta, ….
I hope …( murmur a female name ).. whisk out the door
My fiancé tells me something similar. She’s never orgasmed like she has with me. She’s addicted to it now. She orgasms multiple times usually when we have sex. Not always from PIV but I always use my fingers to make her orgasm at least once before PIV and then it’s common for me to go down on her and make her cum again. Her ex husband would never do either. He would just ask her to fuck or for a blowjob and would last about 30 seconds. So she would get no sexual fulfillment from him. She said she always seemed to find selfish lovers who were quick cummers or did nothing but pound away. If she’s not orgasming or enjoying i lose interest as I enjoy her being pleasured as much of not more than myself. I’ve been like that as long as I can remember. I was in the swinger lifestyle for many years and have seen first hand a lot of guys don’t know what they are doing or focus only on themselves cumming.