I went on a 1st date with a woman, we had a great time, built a lot of chemistry, she was very into me since she was the one who left me her number and we talked. We met up at a bar, grabbed food, and just talked for hours, laughing and teasing each other. Eventually, I told her that since the night was getting young, let’s head back to my place. So we hung out, talked, and had long hours of sex with plenty of cuddling, kissing, and pillow talk. She fell asleep in my arms, but had to leave soon.
We’ve been keeping in touch through text, we would flirt, banter, and tease each other, she’ll usually text me frequently with hey, hi, how are you, or ask me what I’m up to.
Since she usually initiates most of the texts, I decide to text her yesterday. She remembered it was my birthday and replied back with a happy birthday! \^\_\^, and we had a brief phone call. I asked her what her schedule was like this week, and she told me that she had already made plans with her friends for a Halloween party and would let me know/get back to me.
I said cool no problem let me know, and that we’ll keep in touch.
She jokingly made fun of my texting style and wished me a happy birthday before I said good night before we hung up.
I know since we’ve only been on 1 date, and I can’t expect her to just flake on her friends for me. Is this the dreaded, “I’ll let you know that I’m turning you down politely and nice so you don’t freak out,” or the, “I’m interested, how about you give me some time, and try again next week?”
I’m a little inexperienced at dating so I dunno.
15 comments
What. No. If you’re interested just keep persisting until you see her again. Don’t be over bearing obviously, but dont just give up.
seems like she’s interested and just has plans this weekend
I think you’re overthinking it. She MIGHT be letting you down gently, or she might just need to get back to you. So far, all signs look positive, so chill. 🤪
Everyone is different and nobody can tell you the truth but her.
My opinions are as follows: typically if shes “jokingly” making fun of you, shes making fun of you.
She very well could have plans with her friends but if she was truly interested she would have given you a time she was free. Do not text her back, it is on her now.
I feel I’m missing some context about your texting style but she may have started to view you as needy. It sounds like you had sex on the first night playa. Don’t get too invested. If shes interested she will absolutely contact you.
do you really want to be in a relationship with a girl that sleeps with you on the first date?
Everything sounds great to me. Halloween is a fixed holiday and makes sense she already has plans or will let you know. Everything sounds great.
Give her some time. It’s Halloween week after all. You can wait till she gets back to you, or wait till after Halloween to text her and see if she’s still down to make plans with you. If she doesn’t text back, or says no, you should move on.
Odds are she’s letting you down gently, but there’s an easy way to find out: ask her out for a date AFTER Halloween. If she says yes, you’re goid to go. If she doesn’t, you have your answer, and you know you need to move on.
Stay calm she likes you but she need a bit of independence. Try to focus on other things and let her come to you
>Since she usually initiates most of the texts,
She thinks you are not that interested. Women are CONSTANTLY told that if we have to chase, text the most, reach out, then he is not into us.
Bro…why do you worry? Don’t be show you’re too excited to see either. Just be cool about it. Let her be the one to hit you up about when she can next see you. And I hope you don’t text her too much or write too much and that’s what she meant when teasing your texting style.
But you should just relax. And do you. When she’s ready she’ll come to you
From what I can tell she’s legitimately not available this week, so you’ll probably see each other when she’s free again. Keep us updated
I wonder if you’re having a gut feeling about how this is all going to turn out. I know sometimes if a woman has sex on the first date, she may be worried you only see her as someone to have sex with. Reading the comments that you’re very flirty with her… makes me think she may have the impression you only want sex. I could be wrong. I really have no idea based on the info given. Good luck! Hope things work out
Ahhh, I hate that classical BS excuse. Yes, you move on. Girls are always using those when they want to reject you. We’ll see, maybe, don’t have time, I’ll let you know…just their subtle way of refusing your offer cause they are not attracted to you.
This pattern isn’t the same as someone who is truly not interested.