Me (f17) and my bf (17) are eachothers firsts. We have been sexually active for around a year or a little less.
I have never received proper oral and I’d really like to, but my bf says he doesn’t like it (he tried for like 10 seconds once). I respect his decision but he also said that he might be willing to try more in the future maybe. Can guys change their opinion on this as they get older?
I don’t want him to do it either if i know he isn’t enjoying it.
And its not a dealbreaker for me so please don’t tell me to break up with him
4 comments
He can change. Some guys don’t like the “thought” of it but as they mature and gain more confident sexually they get more adventurous and willing to try new positions etc ( speaking from experience). Don’t push it just let it happen naturally. Hope it works out okay
You are very sweet to seriously think about his feelings. As a man, it is sometimes a bit overwhelming going down on a girl at first. There’s new smells/tastes that we are not used to. Then, another thing is if he hasn’t done it before there is a serious concern about it being satisfying for you. We can get sloppy and not know the right places to lick, nibble, etc. But, let him know that it really turns you on and that you’d like to keep trying. He will get over all of those other things. I didn’t like it at first either, but the more practice I got the more I love it. Now, I really love the taste and smell, and cannot get enough. Practice makes perfect, just be a bit patient with him at first. Communication with oral is very important.
*”And its not a dealbreaker for me so please don’t tell me to break up with him”*
Lol you proactively took out half the incoming comments. 🙂
There are different things you can do to make it more enjoyable for him. Showering is a must, and a lot of guys prefer shaving or at least trimming. You can try laying on the edge of the bed so he can sit on the floor in front of you, it reduces discomfort from him having to crank his neck all weird if you’re both laying on the bed. Put a chair behind him so you can rest your legs on it. If he’s iffy on the smell/taste have him pop a couple mints in his mouth when he starts, stronger ones can overpower whatever he’s not sure about. Make sure you provide gentle feedback, tell him what feels good and if he needs to change where he’s focusing his attention, it’ll make him more confident if he knows he’s “hitting the right spot”.
Guys can definitely get more on board with oral sex over time. The idea of having someone else’s crotch in your mouth takes some getting used to for a lot of people, but as he gets more comfortable with it and he knows he’s doing what you like, he’ll probably come around.
The boring and discouraging answer here may be that he really doesn’t like the taste and/or smell.
Try to NOT be self-conscious about that statement.
Because,
a) your natural taste and smell differs over the course of your cycle, and there IS a chance that another part of the month will be easier to enjoy.
b) it’s actually pretty easy to make sure that you smell ONLY of your own arousal; have a shower first.
c) some guys actually PREFER their women sweaty and musky. I’m not one of them so I can’t even begin to explain how that preference works, but it’s worth noting that for some guys it’s better if you smell MORE.
Anyway. If you want this to work, you may have to start with looking into how to create better circumstances, so that it can work.