The second part of the question is a big caveat. Maybe you are not looking to settle down or don’t want a relationship. You are not after a boyfriend or girlfriend. The problem is you still want a sex life and you struggle with casual encounters. You might not be sexually attractive….you don’t fit into stereotypes of a sexually attractive man that women just want casual encounters with. Every woman you meet gives off vibes that they want something serious, and will only see you as a longterm partner. Would you therefore hire an escort in these circumstances? I have not had sex for a long time for the above reason.
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Why not consider enjoying sextoys? Masturbators or sexdolls or whatever you like.