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give her space for a bit and see what happens. if she just doesn’t want sex look for other options
Sounds like it’s over, bro.
Been reading Come As You Are and learning people have a sexual accelerator and a sexual brake. And some are more sensitive to signals that brake, some are in the middle, some are more sensitive to signals that drive their accelerator.
On a daily basis we encounter situations and stimuli that put on the brakes or put on the accelerator. Or maybe keep us at neutral to where we are open to accelerating signals.
For instance, I noticed as the news was on and all the world’s problems were being served on a platter…. the brakes were put on. When I switched to something lighter to help me relax and feel safe, I found I could be more receptive should I encounter an accelerator signal.
The point is, there may be a lot of stress or the house is a mess or a lot of interference that has her brakes pressed hard.
Not saying that’s the whole story. But I would talk to her about that… what is stressing her or what signals might she be encountering that are holding the brakes. She may not know… but you plant it in her head and she may start looking out. Keep an open channel of communication. Ask for her patience as the days go on and you bring it up. The conversation should not be adversarial, but collaborative.
The book i mentioned also talks about other aspects that can influence desire. I just haven’t gotten through it yet. The author has a Ted talk: https://youtu.be/HILY0wWBlBM
Another thing is how does this make you feel? Sometimes just communicating that can at least open your partner up to the need for change and improvement in intimacy.
There’s nothing wrong with this person not wanting sex, but there’s also nothing wrong with wanting a relationship where sex is a bigger part of it. Try to talk to her about it. If physicality is really important to you, and she doesn’t want anything to do with it, then it might just be a bad fit.