I have recently learned I resonate very strongly with this thing called fearful avoidant attachment style in relationships. Anyways it makes a lot of sense looking at past relationships and my childhood. I’d really like to get rid of it so I can have more healthy connections with people. But it seems like all the advice out there is targeted towards women. Also I don’t really know how to talk about my feeling and that seems to be the main advice they give to help it. So given all this what are you guy’s experience with this and how might I fix it?

11 comments

  2. Usually by processing the childhood trauma that caused those attachment issues in therapy.

  3. Some people need therapy. While it is difficult to do, I just choose to behave however I want to behave so whenever I have feelings like that, I just tell myself “oh, wait, no, this is you acting like a crazy person” and then I deliberately act or think differently.

  9. specialized therapist in early trauma (if that’s your issue) and having someone to act as a secure base. You can’t do it alone

  10. Not to sound like a cunt but that finding appears like a fancy chain of words which all come down to you probably lacking the social skills and trustwothy network of real caring people to determine who is a suotable partner. Now, especially your own social skills play a role because confidence in your decisions can be derived from competency to facilitate the desired results.

    It also means knowing what you want which in turn means decidimg to forego on other possibilities even though they might deem temptimg. It requires mindfulness and broadening the spectrum means considering the consequences of the new options you are entertaining.

    It’s a lot of work with no shortcuts, but work enhaces skills, skills grant you confidence and that confidence in turn is a solid foundation for relationship.

    That part about “talking about my feelimgs” is a little vague. What do you mean by that?

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like