A lot of the sexual partners in my (23f) past would make me feel guilty if I didn’t have sex with them the way they wanted.
My current boyfriend (25m) isn’t like that because he genuinely sees me as a partner and not a sex object. I love it, I appreciate it. However, I feel like I’m not doing a good job because I don’t have a good reference as to what he likes.
We’ve talked about it before, and now he makes a point to tell me how much he likes fucking me. But he can’t tell me what he wants because 1) he’s not used to expressing his sexual desires 2) he doesn’t know what he likes.
I know this is a self-esteem issue more than a boyfriend issue. We both enjoy what we’re doing. We’re both taken care of by the end of it. But I want to figure out what he likes. I want to blow his mind. I want make him more than satisfied.
2 comments
Do different things, and ask him which he preferred.
(If you’ve ever been to an optician, you can copy that- do you prefer bj technique a, or bj technique b? Position a, or position b? Etc)
Experiment together to learn what you both like.
It is quite possible your boyfriend is feeling insecure about pleasing you as well.
Just enjoy this journey together, honestly and open, and have fun experiencing and exploring.