Is my thinking wrong?

So back when i was 11 years old i liked this one girl from my class. 2 years after i still liked her but i had major injuries and i became fat and quite ugly. I didn’ t have many friends in school but i would get builled and mocked around every day at school, even every friend that i had was making fun of me(there was about 4 “real friends ” at that time), but there was one friend which i knew all my life that stood out the most, well call him Bob.

One time when our school was going on a 5 day trip Bob asked me if i still liked that girl. They were never really like close and never would talk to each other that much so i said yes thinking it was just a normal question. During the trip he starts talking more with the girl and her 2 friends (I was good friends with one of them). When we got back in school he was still talking with them on breaks and during class, so i thought i might join in because we are all “friends” and it would be fun. Oh I was so fucking wrong, every time I went up to have fun with them Bob would make fun of me and telling them cringy and embarrassing stories about me. Me, Bob and a friend of the girl were living close to each other so i would always go home from school with them, but still he was just making fun of me.

All that shit made me feel so insecure about myself and made me hate myself so much that I would just end up crying all the fucking time i get back from school and needed to hide it from my parents and my sister because i was scared. Also ended up developing social anxiety which i still have now

But here we go we are all about 14 and its the last year of our middle school. I lost interest in that girl because i was so “ugly and fat” as everyone would call me, but another girl from our class that was making fun of me actually started talking to me and i was feeling so happy. Then I told Bob that i liked her now because i felt like someone actually cared about me that isn’t my family. But our beloved Bob starts talking to her and making fun of me in front of her. How did it end up? She got back to making fun of me and not talking to me anymore.

Summer break. I still had about 4 or 5 same friends that would still make fun of me. Even though it was all jokes to them it wasn’t to me and they knew it bothered me but it seemed like they couldn’t care less.

High school starts and for the whole year I met 2 new real friends and I was so proud of myself. My old friends stopped making fun of me and stopped mocking me around i was so happy but still sad inside.

I still somehow felt lonely because all my old friends got new friend groups met so many new people and just wouldn’t invite me anywhere. But then one of them invites me to their birthday party and there i met this one girl that was going in the class with him and… Bob, we can call her Marie. I knew her before but just like from her looks and her name we never actually talked. When we got to that birthday party there was more than 20 people and I had social anxiety so my defensive reflex was that I would turn into someone else, someone I never knew, someone who I didn’t like. I took some time alone to get a hold of myself and then Marie came to me and asked me if i was okay. We ended up talking throughout the whole party, we had so much fun and i was feeling the happiest I ever was. I added her on ig after the party and we would end up talking everyday the entire day for about 2 months, in fact i ended up going out to hang out with her multiple times. One time she hugged me and i thought i was gonna end up in Valhalla. In that 2 months i was going out with Bob and some other people that i didn’t know so I was talking to Bob all the time and told him that i liked Marie, but then he told me that he likes her too??? In that 2 months Bob and her got really close to and Bob fell in “depression “. He never had any struggles with anything or any family problems so that was really odd. Some time later im texting with her and she sent a photo and she was crying. She said she was so worried about Bob and couldn’t stop thinking about him. I tried to calm her down and it kinda worked. I was worried that she would end up throwing me off like others. She seemed fine later and i lost weight and wasn’t that ugly anymore so i aksed her to go out again and we actually did but she was just talking about Bob all the time.

6 months go by and we are all about 16 now. Bob gets out of his “depression” starts talking with her like crazy, does all this crazy shit with her and now they are together and me and Marie are still ok friends but I feel like shes just vanishing from me.

So is Bob purposely ruining me?