We have known each other a while. She finally has come around to hanging out more. I made a “move” last time and held her hand for a bit. Later I text and asked if anything made her uncomfortable and she said “no not at all”.
So 1.) she didn’t mind that. 2.) i assume if she wasn’t somewhat interested in me we wouldn’t be hanging out. Agree? Disagree?
This being said. I feel there may be a window of opportunity here and I want to try to make a big move. Maybe a kiss? Mouth or neck? What is the best way to do this? Let hands and body language tell me when? Or see how close she will get and just ask her?
I’ve been out of this “game” so long I feel lost.
2 comments
Ask her out on a date. Stop playing games and let her know you’re into her. We’re not in grammar school anymore.
Tbh, you kind of dropped the ball already. You made three rookie mistakes:
1) holding her hand is not “making a move”, that’s the precursor to making a move. If she was holding your hand then that means she felt attraction, you should have gone in for the kiss then. Women want to feel the “spark”, but you didn’t light it.
2) you talked to her about the hand holding. Don’t ever talk about showing affection or making a move. That kills the mood. You’re taking her out of the feeling. Just make your move, she’ll either reciprocate or turn you down.
3) stop with the “hangouts”. If you’re interested in her then you need to ask her out. “Hanging out” is a textbook way to friend zone yourself.
I’m not making fun of you, I’ve made all these mistakes myself in the past. Take these as learning points.
Concerning the “making a move”, it’s all about gauging how she feels. DO NOT ask to kiss her. That makes you look unconfident, insecure and it kills the mood. It also suggests that you can’t read cues and women find that to be a turn off. It’s hard to explain this in writing but you have to look for the main signs. If she’s reciprocating your advances (like holding your hand), and drawing close to you, and she has that “look” in her eye, and you can feel the sexual tension between you two then it’s time to go in for the kiss on the mouth. Start by leaning in. If she responds by leaning in then she wants you to kiss her, go for it. Not too slow not too fast. If she reciprocates then boom, you succeeded. Really though this is something you can’t learn just by reading, you have to experience it and get the feel for it. It comes with practice.
Anyways, If this girl is still talking to you she might still be interested but you need to act fast. Schedule a romantic date, like dinner or something similar. The important thing is that you be assertive. You’ve already revealed your cards, if you act timid about it now you’re going to make yourself look timid and wishy-washy and she’ll be turned off. Don’t ask her “do you want to go out?” Instead, tell her “let’s get dinner on ____” or something similar. If she says yes then you’re in business. If she declines then you have your answer and you can move on.