It’s something that has been bothering me. But twice I’ve been with women that have initiated condomless sex and it’s made me feel uncomfortable afterwards. They seem to be a fan of the pullout method but it’s not something I’m used to since I’m new to sex and at the same time I feel like it means I don’t do enough.
On top of that it’s followed up with complaints about taking Plan B because it messes with their hormones which annoys me because I pay for the pill and not them when THEY initiated.
EDIT: I want to add to my fear because recently we did it raw a while after I took the condom off and I am unsure if I even cleaned it well enough before hand but we had condoms right there! Now I’m worried if she does get pregnant because we’d have to pay for the abortion pill which is an issue financially and also affects them. They don’t want kids, but still…
32 comments
Pull out method, the preferred birth control of parents everywhere
Because they are being reckless and immature. They haven’t thought of how the consequences will affect them, or they have and don’t care, or a lot of alcohol or drugs is involved which makes some people less cautious. Don’t let them manipulate you into doing something you aren’t comfortable with. I know women who purposefully had unprotected with strangers because they wanted a baby. Beware of sperm bandits.
Completely understand where ur coming from. Unfortunately, condomless feels better to both sides, and being responsible about wearing them falls to both sexual partners. There were occasions I had to insist or walk away from sex because we didn’t have protection.
There’s an old saying “if they say u don’t need a condom, *u definitely want to wear a condom*”. There’s a fair chance ur not the only person they’re sleeping with raw. Be careful out there
Personally it does feel better without a condom – but there as to be a better plan whether that’s spermicide along with pulling out or she should suck it up and use a condom. Don’t get trapped by some girl being immature. Especially if the abortion pill will be a financial issue a kid will be way worse.
If you’re uncomfortable with it you have every right to refuse. And if she won’t have sex with you because of it then you’re better off
Gotta fight that shit bro, or you’re going to end up paying for it for 18 years. Stay strong.
For me, I take hormonal birth control so I don’t have to use condoms. So not worried about the risk of pregnancy, and if it did happen I’m pro choice.
You know that you don’t have to have unprotected sex if you don’t want to, right?
It is not only guys that don’t like condoms
Hold your ground do what your comfortable. I’ve had girls tease me doe putting on a condom, but I don’t wanna risk anything or stress so for me it’s just worth to wear one
a lot of people don’t know how reproduction and women’s bodies work, including women. a lot of us aren’t given proper information on pregnancy prevention and some women think the pullout method is reliable. a LOT of people have been failed by the education system.
that said, you don’t have to have unprotected sex even if that’s what she wants. you’re allowed to have rules.
Just because you are not a woman does not mean you cannot set boundaries. Next time you have sex, with anyone, only do what you are comfortable with. Sex should be enjoyable, don’t let them bully you into doing things that are not enable to you. If I were a man I would be freaked out too. It’s how my husband became a father with a “woman” who lied about being on the pill.
I do it cause I’m on birth control. These women seem to just be reckless.
grow a damn spine and hold your boundaries. if you go raw, you deal with the consequences. don’t run around talking about who started it as if you are toddlers in an argument.
Life pro tip: the more they fight against condoms, the more you need to use them. same goes for workers unions
Why do you seem so helpless at the situation?
Consent goes both ways.
You don’t consent to condomless sex, then even if she wants sex, and she wants it raw – there ain’t no sex happening dude. Just say no. Don’t get into it.
Some chick will trap you into child support, without you ever wanting kids from unknown chick. That’s why the term is called ‘family planning’, where you make sure you and your partner – both want kids, and more importantly WHEN do you want kids.
If you don’t want kids, you use protection. Heck! Use protection to save yourself from HIV, because as far as I understood, you are having sex with women you barely know, they can straightaway lie about their STDs and you wouldn’t even know. Why are you even risking your life?
Because they’re rolling the dice that there won’t be consequences.
During my single days I was surprised by how many women were very willing to go raw, even on a first date. It was weird that I was the more responsible one, but I was.
If you don’t want to have condomless sex, don’t do it. I’m speaking as someone who prefers the pullout method, has casual sex, and pretty much will not have penetrative sex with condoms. I still know how to respect someone with firm boundaries about condoms, even if that makes us sexually incompatible with certain sex acts. If someone is pressuring you, drop them.
Because some people are dumb? And then if you just go along with it, then you’ve joined their little club. Maybe just get matching hats?
Women that have a high appetite for both sex and risk will do this. If they weren’t horny they’d be mortified at what they tried. It’s happened to me a couple of times. They just like going with it in the moment and the riskiness adds to the excitement. It’s dangerous and stupid in my opinion, and I shut it down both times.
Stop agreeing to that, period. There are lots of reasons why someone might do this, but none of them are worth the risk whatsoever.
Everyone is being way too nice about this. OP, you’re acting like something was done TO you. It wasn’t. YOU did a risky, irresponsible thing and then ask “why WOMEN do risky, irresponsible things.” You could get a girl pregnant. You could get or give a disease. Your dick got hard and you put it in some women. Stop acting like you’re a passive observer here, it takes two to have sex and you could have stopped at any point. Be more responsible.
Why do you engage in condomless sex if it makes you uncomfortable?
The real question is why do you consent to condomless sex, with the risk of pregnancy. It takes 2 people to make a baby.
Post nut clarity applies to women too. In the moment, they are more interested in risky behavior or impulsive desires that they wouldn’t normally be into.
Pullout ‘method’ is not a ‘method.’
It’s a gamble for stupid people to potentially win stupid prizes.
And frankly, pregnancy is probably the least of your concerns.
Go and get a full STI panel immediately.
Same reason guys do, they feel the reward of a more pleasurable sex is worth the risk of pregnancy. Could be that they underestimate that risk or just aren’t thinking about it as possible in that moment.
Wear it for you, if they aren’t okay with it and don’t want to continue then oh well. Plenty of fish in the seas so they say. Because if you don’t then the second she does become pregnant DECISIONS ARE NO LONGER YOURS. Namely if she wants to have the child you are responsible for that child, whether that is an 18+ year co-parenting with a person you weren’t looking to be in a relationship with or financially paying child support and potentially being looked at differently. The couple of seconds/minutes of fun aren’t worth it unless you plan for it with a person you want a future with.
T.L.D.R. People being irresponsible isn’t a gendered thing, so you need to be a responsible person for you.
If she gets pregnant it will affect you too. What if she chooses to keep it ? If I were you I wouldn’t risk it.
It could be because they have had sex with no condom many times before and have not gotten pregnant. They are sure that if they have not gotten pregnant before, they won’t get pregnant now. That is not a good mindset to have.
The same reason men initiate condomless sex when they are at risk of getting a girl pregnant, and herpes and AIDS.
They’re not thinking clearly.
To address the discomfort you feel, if ever either person is uncomfortable about an aspect of sex, you shouldn’t do the thing that makes you uncomfortable.
Get a vasectomy
My milf FWB is like that, she had me get a blood test but now we do it all with no condom. She had her tubes tied so it seems no risk. It’s certainly fun 😁.
If you don’t feel comfortable going raw, then don’t. Men are expected to respect a woman’s boundaries, and frankly women should do the same.