how do I stop being a shy person. I’ve always been this way my whole life. Very chill. If you talk to me I will talk to you. Im not a rude person but I do have a RBF. Im always asked what’s wrong and if im okay. I have a few friends and a bf. Im outgoing with my friends and comfortable with them. with strangers I find that I can chat and start convos but i most like to keep to myself. I’m starting to beat myself. even around my own family I am quiet and can only be comfortable around certain members who I’ve been comfortable with growing up.
With my bf it took me so long to crack open my shell and I’m still trying my best. I can’t sing or dance informer of him cause I’m so shy. I don’t know why. his family is the other thing. They’re so extroverted and outgoing. I’ve been around and they’ve made comments like “you haven’t said a words in the last 30 mins and they laugh” I try not to take it to heart but I do. or I’ve heard before in the background like she “doesn’t speak” as jokes and it gets To me. my bf is just like his family obviously.he’s outgoing loud funny goofy competitive and I admire that about him. yet I’m starting to beat myself up for not being the same. In gatherings I could never be loud out going or enhance in conversation. I can only do it with a person one on one. I’ve cried to him that I don’t like that they think I’m miserable or always upset I’m just like that quiet and reserved. He says I’m always” moping around “ and everyone can see it. I told him I’m not that I’m actually sitting there thinking about what to say and freaking out about how awkward I am. I’m sitting there thinking I’m not the one because I don’t fit in I’m sitting there thinking they’re making fun of me for not saying a work the last 30 mins . I’m. Thinking they’re all wondering why he’s with me. I just freeze up. and get poked at it for it. But I know if I don’t want that how do I change this. We were playing a game and I said an answer and someone said oh she said it! And they were like well speak up and my bf said “Riiight” I got hurt hurt. he said that’s always gonna be him loud blunt me that I’m very sensitive and that his family and him are not like that so i can either suck it up and try to fit in or I can leave if I don’t feel comfortable. I don’t know what to do or what’s steps to take. It’s really consuming me because it’s making me reconsider if we’re ven meant to be or if I belong here. However I know it’s something I want to change about myself because if I hate the comments and the jokes I know it’s something I should fix.