Been together for 14 years with the wife and we don’t sleep together anymore. Reasons for this are she’s snores like a train(earplugs don’t help much) and also I like my space in bed and struggle to sleep with someone next to me. It’s been like this for about 4years now. Speaking to friends etc, this seems pretty common and the “norm”. Is it?
35 comments
Lived together 5 years and been married 4. I think we’ve had separate bedrooms for about 4 and a half years due to my snoring. Makes sense, now we both get a good nights sleep.
I get earache from her if I don’t go to bed when she does (way too early in the evening), let alone sleeping in a separate room!
Been with my husband for 20 years, we always sleep beside each other. Even tho he snores badly sometimes!!
I would find it strange to sleep in separate beds.
What do you when your wanting to have sex?
Once finished say that’s me done, I’m away to my own bed now? Ha ha.
Yeah we still sleep together, but neither of us snore.
Snoring. Hubby literally sounded like wrestling a bear. Turns out it was sleep apnea and he actually wasn’t breathing for 30 odd minutes every hour. Might be worth getting them checked!
Oh so yes – still share a bed, 20 years now!
** thank you for the award kind person!!**
I have never been good at co-sleeping.
Sleep health is very important to me and the only way that I can properly sleep is alone.
My partner and I have been together for 8 years, it has never been a problem.
Been together 11 years and we do share a bed. I actually think he helps me sleep, he cuddles me and that stops me tossing and turning.
We’ve been married 7 months but lived together for 8 years. Still share our bed. I snore badly and talk in my sleep. But tbh I go to bed a lot earlier than him due to work patterns. I know lots of people who don’t share a bed with their partners but I know a lot of people who do. Personal preference I suppose
The couple we bought our house from last year were in their 60s and were second timers. They never slept in the same bed. We’ve been married 37 years and my wife uses me as a hot water bottle in the winter then scoots to the far edge of the bed in the summer. I find it very strange to sleep in our bed on my own but love the freedom when I’m working away. We’re all rather strange aren’t we?
Been with my wife for over 35 years and never sleep alone unless one of us is ill.
I haven’t slept next to my boyfriend, by choice, in years. I am a very light sleeper and I struggle to sleep in a bed with anyone, regardless of who it is. Luckily he understands, and also likes me more when I’m well rested and not a massive bitch 😂
Lived together for 13/14 years, married for going on 12
Still sleep together
Hate it when we don’t
People. You stop worrying what’s normal or not. if it works for you guys brilliant.
Ask your SO how she feels.
We’ve been together 32 years and always share a bed. I think if it wasn’t a kingsize bed then it wouldn’t work as well ‘cause he’s fidgety. I wouldn’t be happy sleeping apart – it’s good waking up to a warm man😁
I miss my girl when I’m away in hotels.
Would rather wake up beside her.
Married 10 years and we sleep in separate beds. If my parents knew, they’d think we were on the brink of divorce!
I like it warm with the electric blanket, he likes it cold. We both like our space too. We still snuggle up in one of our beds and watch tv or YouTube together, just one of us leaves before falling asleep.
Together 21 years, haven’t shared a bed at home for about 12 years. We go to bed at different times, get up at different times, plus he’s a snorer. We both get much better sleep this way and probably have a stronger relationship for it.
I think it is quite normal, but still seems weirdly taboo.
25 years and counting!
Was for my late husband and I; I snore like an angry rhino
Been married over four years and we always sleep together in the same bed.
Recently we went to the US and our hotel room had two twin beds and he was upset at the thought of us sleeping separately (whereas I was looking forward to the extra space!) and insisted on sleeping on the same twin bed. It was quite sweet actually, i didnt realise he was such a softie!
10 years and yes.
Separate duvets is game changing.
Yes, 13 years together and we’ve always shared a bed. He’s not been here for the last 3 weeks and I’ve not slept well as a result.
We still sleep together after 8 years, even though we both snore like locomotives. I’m so used to it that I find it hard to sleep when he’s *not* snoring.
We have a super king bed, so there’s really no issue with space. When we stay elsewhere and can’t get at least a king, we do struggle a bit because we both overheat very easily.
7 years and we sleep separately – we have very different mattress needs, I’m a very light sleeper, and I toss and turn a lot. Every now and then we’ll share the same bed, and often in the morning one of us comes into the other’s bed for a morning cuddle. As with all other aspects of a relationship, it can be whatever you want and whatever works best for you both – there’s no right or wrong.
Yes , married 32 years but game changer was separate duvets. Perfect
We do. But if one of us wakes the other due to snoring or moving too much, the offending party moves to the spare room.
If one of us has a cold or other issue that causes night time faffing, we just sleep seperately.
I reckon people who force themselves to always share the same bed are risking their health as bad sleep causes all kinds of bad shit.
no, and pretty much never did as we like different temperatures, duvet weights, sleep routines (TV vs music via headphones), windows open/closed, light levels on going to bed plus different wake up routines PLUS we have almost always had to wake at different times for work / Often gone to bed at different times.
Stopped a LOT of fighting about stuff and helped as we independently developed snoring issues.
I’ve been with my partner for 6 years, I used to go sleep on the sofa because it was bad no earplugs would work. I have worked 12 hour night and dayshifts for a few years and could sleep just about anywhere now from the exhaustion.
Not married, but been with my partner 6 years. Technically, yes, we share a bed, but he works shifts and I don’t, so we each get a decent amount of ‘alone time’ in bed. He also has a tendency to just pass out on the sofa instead of coming to bed!
He snores like nothing I’ve ever heard before so I don’t mind the alone time, but I got these little Bose noise-cancelling sleepbuds that play white noise while you sleep and they’ve been an absolute game-changer. Might be something to consider if you do decide to share a bed again?
We sleep separately, my husband snores, sweats and stinks. We’re happier sleeping separately.
I think this is actually more common than people like to admit. I sleep better in a bed alone. That doesn’t mean my husband and I have a bad relationship or anything. We fall asleep together and then one of us will move to the spare room if/when the other one is being bothersome (snoring/tossing and turning or whatever). Everyone is happier when everyone has had a good night’s sleep! Intimacy still happens, we make plans for that…
We have been together 9 years and have seperate homes. It works for us. We used to live together for 3 years but we prefer our own homes. I stay over a fair bit.
Separate bedrooms since living [together. Best](https://together.Best) decision we every made.
Sleeping together is massively over rated
I sleep in a different room, I love her utterly but my god she snores like wookie and I’m a light sleeper.