What is the best way to avoid divorce when you are first married?

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  2. Communicate the problems you have, even the little ones.

    Research shows that the couples who argue the most, in a healthy way, stay together longer. You don’t want your problems to build up because one person will end up exploding.

  3. Remember every day the best way to stay married is to treat her like you plan to ask her to marry you each night.

  4. I guess be married in a country where there is no extra incentives to divorce.

    Apart from that your best chance is to be the best man she can possibly get, even though it seems this one isn’t working out too great either.

    At this point I’m just wondering why people even get married, especially those who are not religious.

  5. Communication, no matter what anyone says. It’s also the quickest way to divorce. Good luck.

  6. Well, it really starts with marrying the right person. And more importantly, being the right person yourself.

  7. If you don’t marry in the first place, then you avoid it all together.

    Big brain 🧠

  8. * Couples counseling before and after the wedding. You don’t need to be “in trouble” for counseling to be useful.

    * Talk – communication is important

    * Share the work – you don’t have to split everything 50/50 but if one of you is working on something, the other shouldn’t be just lounging – unless you’re talking about it. (E.g: my wife is putting the kiddos to bed – I’m doing the dishes and cleaning up. I’m making dinner, she’s folding clothes. It helps to feel like you both recognize the work the other is doing – but also, explicitly acknowledging it with thank you’s is a good thing).

    * it’s cheesy but useful – learn about love languages, ideally both of you – it makes sense of implicit expectations in relationships about how people express and look for affection and validation

  9. Pre-marital counseling and agreement up-front about four main things that drive divorce: religion, money, kids, in-laws.

  10. Communication and honesty.

    Don’t hold onto grudges. All that does is fester inside you and is used as ammunition during an argument.

    The honeymoon period always ends. Make date nights part of your routine. Sit down together and make a list of fun things to do or try. Periodically pick one and have an adventure.

    Have those important conversations BEFORE getting married. Long term goals.. do either of you want/not want kids…pets…stuff like that.

  13. Keep dating. Stay in shape. Split household chores evenly. Communicate. Support each others hobbies.

  14. Marry for love, not out of fear of being alone. Make sure you know the person intimately before you marry.

  16. communication without ego. Seriously , set all your ego aside. Apologies for your short comings. And make sure both party’s can admit fault. Ego is the #1 killer of marriage. Both sides always have to feel right about SOMETHING. If your wife isn’t your best friend. Then you need to figure out how to be best friends again. Best friends don’t have giant egos with each other (usually) cause you know all your bullshit.

  18. probably dont marry 2 weeks after your first date, sometimes people are rushing things and rushed things may not be that good with some time

  20. Don’t marry just to not be alone, just to say you are married. All those family and friends you feel judging you for not are *not* going to be around to help you maintain your relationship. It’ll just be you and her, so make sure she’s actually Mrs. Right, and not just Mrs. Right-now.

    You don’t have *anything* to prove to all those other judgy assholes who try to tell you how to live your life without having to live it themselves. The sooner you’re at peace with that, the happier you’ll be.

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