I (21F) have been with my bf (23M) for 3 years. His sex drive has been rocky since like maybe 1 year and a half into our relationship . But now it’s just weird. I always initiate sex, and most of the times he says “I’m not in the mood for it”. And he also brings up the fact that he we just had it x amount of days ago. The other day he surprisingly came to me wanting sex. And while we were in the beginning of doing it, and a couple strokes in he lost his boner inside me. I was confused, and he told me it wasn’t was me, it was him. He could tell I was hurt so he basically forced himself to get a boner just to please me but I was already emotionally out of it. Today which would be three days after the incident, I tried to initiate it since we were alone. He straight up told me, he’s not in the mood and that I need to stop because if we keep doing it a lot that it will get boring. But if I don’t initate it, we literally could go days without it. What should I do? Is there a reason he’s doing this to me?
6 comments
Porn addict?
I know it is hard to hear. Move on from him.
He doesn’t communicate.
Forced hard on to make you happy.
Could have few reasons…
Maybee you can try new things so the sex is excited again
Maybee he masturbate much
Maybee you are a lot in the mood
He probably is watching to much porn or truly has ED. Does he have diabetes?
My bet is he is going through a difficult time in life and his mind is focused on the problems.
But who knows
One incident you mentioned: ‘he initiated and then lost his boner’, tells me something might be wrong physically or emotionally with him. He might be feeling too embarrassed to have a discussion with you and also worried about losing you.
IMO he needs professional help. Pls visit a doctor together with him for physical issues and therapist as well for emotional issues. That would be great start: once you know the problem would be far easier to solve it. Rightnow we only know the symptoms. All the best!