This isn’t really relationship advice since we broke up but i don’t know where to go. my ex ended things a week ago and I just cannot get over her. we’ve been friends for years (both f) and suddenly we were dating a few months ago. now i feel lost. i don’t want her out of my life but i feel like it’s not healthy for me to keep her so close. i don’t know why it’s so hard for me to get over her. i just feel so hurt and angry by how this was all handled. she is so incredibly important to me and i don’t want her gone. i can’t stop thinking about her & she’s even haunting my dreams which is wild bc i usually don’t have any. i woke up the other night & just cried because i dreamt we went on a date & that all was okay & realizing it’s not just choked me up. i am holding back everything in me to not text her how much i fucking miss her. i know saying that will just create distance. i told her i would not beg her if she decided she needed to go but hell i am almost on my knees. i fell for her a lot harder than both of us anticipated i guess. it really hurts knowing she never felt that way about me. i don’t know what to do. i don’t know how to keep her in my life & not feel such immense hurt from all that happened. i know it’s fresh but i have a very big heart & i know it won’t heal as it was before. if i have another dream of her smile i think i’ll just break. even more than missing her as my girlfriend, i miss her as my best friend. i feel like the minute we got together i lost that part of her & now they’re both gone. i really cannot handle this i just don’t know what to do i feel so hurt & i wish there was anything i could do to make her want to try with me again. but she doesn’t value any of this like i do. & i don’t even know why i’d want her to try again. it wasn’t perfect when we were together but regardless she made me so happy. but why am i so broken up about someone who can’t even respond to my texts?? i’ll never know. i’ll just sit & sulk instead i guess i have no idea. all i want is to talk to her right now but she’s living her life & i’m hating mine. i don’t know how to get over this.