I don’t understand how it works, and I realize that it’s only going to get worse from here.
In order to bring you closer to the situation, I will present two major *”problems”*.
**1.** I have (above) average IQ but noticeable social difficulties – undiagnosed autism (my country’s health system only recognizes the most severe type / Level 3) which is terrible given that I’ve never (in my life) had proper help and support when it comes to dealing with social interactions, managing my social life and getting a better understanding of that. Although I taught myself some social skills over the years – in order to survive, I’m just terrible at socializing, making friends and **I don’t know how to leave a good impression.**
Even though I genuinely care about people (even strangers) and want to help and be kind – I regularly have shutdowns, and my horrible coordination and “out of sync” body language is a dead giveaway that I’m *different* \- which no masking can help. I never expected anything in return, but there were numerous instances where people accepted my help with open arms, but went out of their way to sabotage or even laugh at me (as if I were less of a human being) when I really needed help.
**2.** I live in a country with a very **high power distance** and **collectivist** mentality and culture.
This means that the feeling of community is so strong, that you don’t have any chances of thriving unless you have many friends or a few very important friends – and we are talking about very, very basic things – like getting a job, being respected and accepted. This is not only unfair but also severely discriminating toward those with social difficulties or disabilities.
High power distance means total social acceptance that “we are all equal, but some people are more equal than others”, which simply makes it difficult to reach out to someone and be taken seriously or treated with even a little bit respect, let alone network with them.
Discrimination against people with disabilities is more or less a common (everyday) thing.
I know that whining won’t help, so **I’ve come to ask for your help.**
I’m now an adult, and I need to connect with more people in order to live a normal life – which I don’t know how to do.
I noticed that most people my age have a well-developed network of contacts – they know people from diverse fields on whom they can rely, but who can also rely on them (such as doctors, psychologists, musicians, dentists, craftsmen, workers in education, supermarkets,…)
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