am I manipulative for talking about relationship expectations without telling partner beforehand?

Me, 34F just recently started relationship with 34M. I’ve been friends with him much longer for maybe 8 years. It’s long distance and he tends to be the an emotionally aloof kinda guy, though kind in actions, polite, straightforward. Right now it feels like he is uninvolved in getting this relationship going. He doesn’t really ask me how I am, he sends simple good morning and goodnight texts.

In recent online voice call, I tried to discuss about frequency of our phone calls as I wish to increase them, but he doesn’t want it and said once a week is enough. He questioned me asking this and indicated that I’m insecure. It escalated into him saying I should have told him from the beginning that I wanted to discuss about our relationship in the voice call, which I didn’t (I just asked if we could just talk), and he said I was manipulative in the sense that I always want things my way and would talk until I get what I want. Granted maybe I’m not clear in communicating my needs, but manipulative is one new way to describe me. As friends before, maybe he has heard me vent about many things that he did not like, boiling down to my self-esteem issue which is understandably tiring to a point.

Kinda confused if I’m ever manipulative. I was previously told I’m fragile, annoying and can be tiring, but manipulative is new. I’m trying to improve myself, I told him this too, and he said mostly I say this as “just words”.