What advice would you give your 20 year old self about dating?

35 comments

1. Wrap IT UP!

2. Have fun. Be safe.

3. Just don’t date, it’s overrated, it’s a lot of stress that you don’t want, just focus on your studies man.

   I’ve lived it, I’m telling you not to do it, just get your head in the books

4. Get your shit together before you try to get into her pants.

5. I’d tell him to remember that all but one relationship will eventually end so don’t worry about racking up numbers or not being single. Instead, focus on finding someone who will make a good wife and mother to your future kids. If you don’t think she is someone you see yourself marrying, then break up and don’t waste each other’s time.

6. I would tell myself to build more self confidence which cascades to so much in life.

   Be a confident dresser and have a sense of style, nothing crazy but being intentional with outfits sets you apart.

   Be confident with your time. Make commitments for yourself and hold them – gym, hobby time, friendships, education, etc. You shouldn’t be available every night of the week.

   Be confident approaching women – talk to them and get a sense of there’s a connection, let them know you want to go on a date, and propose a time. Don’t ask to “hang out” or other vague ideas.

   Be confident in your career and in your professional resiliency. Don’t like your job now? Are you networking? Are you going back to school? Are you trying to go out on your own? Be confident enough to have goals and be working towards them.

7. If she left him for you,

   Now you’re him, and the next one is you.

   Comprendé?

8. Listen more, do more stuff, pay attention, be kind, dont flip when something doesnt go your way, dont keep scores on shit, love more, make it happy for both, work at it everyday. And stop being dickhead

9. Uninstall the apps, lift weights, and take up some activities that are female dominated

10. Just talk to the girl. She is as nervous as you are.

11. If you’re going to give up on women, at least don’t give up on your career prospects.

12. When you meet the right person, they’re not going to leave you wondering about how they feel about you

13. this might sound bad but it’s really the truth

    if you want a good life with healthy relationships and good decisions. It is necessary to be a little judgmental.

    not extremely or unfairly judgmental. i’m not saying be mean. but a healthy mindful way of being critically judgmental when you meet people and experience situations is key

    when you meet someone think to yourself “why did they say that?” “do i like what they just said?” “do i want this type of person to be around me?”. just asking yourself questions

    i used to be the type of person that never judged anyone. i always looked past things and would be very understanding. and i would continually get into draining and toxic relationships

    and it’s because i wasn’t being judgmental. i would see negative parts of their personality and i would just think nothing of it. i would excuse it and think “who am i to judge”. but really I should’ve had a healthy amount of judgment and realized that these traits were warning signs to stay away

    you become the people you are around. and if you don’t have a good sense of what you want. you’ll be drained

14. If she acted unfaithful to her previous guy, there’s no reason why she won’t do the same to you.

15. Enjoy the fucking ride amigo. It going to be wild one and no u can’t get off and there is no refunds.

16. The same advice I still have now, don’t worry about it.

17. Tbh sometimes I think my current self needs some advice from my 20 yo self.

18. Don’t focus on getting laid. Focus on making connections and getting to know the other person and the sex will follow

19. Be brave, get out there and be social!

20. Get out IRL. Stop obsessing and inventing scenarios. Ask them out. Keep doing it. You will get rejected. But you will know. And it saves so much mental energy. It’s basically a game. The more you do it. The better you get at it. You don’t need to wear suits. But wear clothes that fit you and suit you. It makes 10x difference (especially if you’re overweight). Be forward, be bold and confident. But respectful and non creepy. It makes a massive difference and honestly. As someone with a lot of female friends it makes you stand out. Read the room

21. Relax. Don’t be afraid to ask. Put yourself out there and just have fun.

22. Until it’s a committed relationship don’t trust her when she says she’s on birth control.

23. Be open to partners who you don’t think are your type. Give it a chance. Give yourself a chance.

24. Stop listening to people whose dating advice boils down to “date someone you aren’t attracted to”.

25. My favorite advice is.

    If you try too hard to chase butterflies then you’ll never catch one. If you build a garden then butterflies will want to come to you.

    And if there’s no butterflies in your garden then it’s okay because you still have a garden.

    Thank you I plagiarized this quote from online.

26. Don’t take it so serious. You’re not trying to find a wife first time out.

27. Take more risks, don’t be timid, be more confident.

28. Being rejected hurts like hell and there is no way around it. It will go away and you’ll feel worthy again, though, so don’t hesitate too much

29. Dump her. She’s going to take EVERYTHING and it almost kills you.

    You have so much potential you’re wasting on her.

30. Use your big head, not the little one.

31. Be yourself. It works.

    Also yourself is autistic so, yeah, take that into account.

    Don’t sleep with any woman who wants you. Be at least somewhat selective. See further comments about sticking your dick in crazy.

    If she says “you aren’t a real man” or the like, run. Run fast.

32. Just try not to be unattractive in mind and body

33. Don’t use dating apps

34. “They’re flirting with you, you idiot!”

35. I’m not 20 yet so it’s kinda hard to answer to this lol