I am seeing this girl, and we just started talking about what we like during sex. She said she likes it rough, but I’ve never really had rough sex before as my ex was very vanilla and timid.
Do I just fuck her hard? Grad her by the hair and bend her over and go ham? Choke her? Pin her down? Pick her up? Do what I want? I want to make sure she’s comfortable, but what makes sex “rough” ?
9 comments
Just give it to her rough !!!
Everyone’s interpretation of rough sex could be different so the best approach is to ask her exactly what she likes when being rough. I know this isn’t the answer you want to hear but communication with her is going to provide you with the best answers on how to please her.
Spit on her pussy
Head over to Kink and take some of their training classes called Kink University.
The studio in San Francisco used to have in person education. But since they got kicked out of San Francisco, they’re now in Nevada, so I don’t know if they still do in person training or not but they do have it online education.
https://www.kink.com/channel/kink-university
i want to say try things and you’ll fine what works for you i know others in the comments have kind of said it but rough means completely different things for others. communication is key and if you guys talk it out you will be able to have the best sex rather than just guessing and hoping for the best
Find out what “rough” means to her. Have a conversation about likes/dislikes in that area and make sure her boundaries are clear. If those are things you are comfortable with, then go to town my friend.
You need to ask her what her boundaries and limits are, hard No’s, ect. Rough means different things to different people, and everyone has different tolerance levels too.. Some personal examples of rough sex my husband and I have: he pulls my hair, chokes me, slaps my ass, thrusts really hard, holds me down, picks me up and throws me around.
Take some lessons before you do something wrong or dumb (free tutorials on HUB)
break the piggy and buy some toys/props and have fun (remember it’s about her, not you)
Suggestion #1: whatever you do, don’t dive straight into choking or forceful hitting. Unless you’re sure that’s what she wants. And you double-check also b/c even a miscommunication here could lead to serious problems.
Suggestion #2: it’s easy enough to find out what “rough” means to her even through some mild sexting. Or just talk to her over drinks, preferably shortly before you have sex again. It’ll probably get you both in the mood to go bang out what you just talked about.
Suggestion #3: incremental progression — consider incorporating new things every time you have sex. Probably thrust hard/fast and pull her every time. These are the basics But then add new things. Your sex will stay novel for longer, and that’s usually what people like.
Suggestion #4: if you’re not already, definitely incorporate some dirty talk. This usually goes hand in hand with rough sex. Eg: “you love getting drilled, don’t you” and “you sure love getting your pussy pounded”?
In my experience, women whose predominant preference is for rough sex often also enjoy being called a “slut” or enjoy the idea of being “used.” But definitely double-check this “slut/used” addition to the dirty talk because that could go sideways.
Enjoy. Sounds like you’re gunna some fun. If you’re up for it, let us know what you incorporate / what ends up being hot for her.