Is kissing supposed to feel like something?

32 comments

1. Yes, well for many people yes. I suppose it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. But for me, if I’m interested or have feelings for the person I’m kissing it’s often passionate, it gives me butterflies. If I’m not interested in them anymore or it is just a random kiss then it doesn’t feel the same/or like anything.

2. I hate it, I prefer little pecks on the cheeks only occasionally. You are not missing something, kissing style or kissing at all is a preference.

3. I’m a guy and it really doesn’t do much for me in terms of excitement. But it feels really loving the longer I date someone.

4. Kissing is one way to show love. Physical affection. I don’t like kissing a lot, but I do like seeing the person I like feel good because I’m kissing them.

5. The first one or couple can be a little awkward! That’s ok!

6. It’s more of an emotional thing than a physical one.

7. I didn’t like kissing and never felt much from it until recently with my now bf and I’m 29.
   It could be because I am sober now though.

8. Kissing someone you LIKE (sexually/romantically) does cause feelings for most people.

   Kissing someone you are indifferent to or dislike does not cause any feelings in most people afaik.

   Do you like the person you kissed

9. Ideally kissing should make you feel good. Generally kissing releases oxytocin in the brain and boosts dopamine and serotonin levels, which combine to feel good both physically and emotionally and can produce a feeling of euphoria and increase the bond between you and the person.

   That being said, this definitely does not happen during EVERY kiss. There’s lots of reasons you may not feel this way, including but not limited to anxiety prior to the kiss, lack of attraction to the person, the kiss being overall bad or awkward, or just not being in the mood. Alternatively, some people just generally for whatever reason don’t like kissing at all. This is common in the asexual community, although of course that is a wide spectrum and there are still many asexuals who do.

   Since this is your first kiss, I wouldn’t worry about it too much right now. Lots of first kisses are a bit underwhelming because there’s a lot of pressure on it and you/your partner may not have had a lot of opportunity to build good kissing skills.

   Take your time and see how you feel going forward. If you still are interested or attracted to this person and you feel comfortable doing so, you can try practicing more with them and see if it gets better over time. If not, when you feel ready, go ahead and try it out with other people (assuming you are not still with said person) and see how you like it with them better.

   Don’t be afraid to try this out with people of all sorts of genders if you think that might be something you’d be interested in. In my experience kissing men and kissing women often feels different, so you might enjoy one more than the other.

   I don’t think this is necessarily a strong indicator that you’re asexual, but it’s worth learning more about just to see if it feels right to you. There are many ways to be asexual.

10. We use our mouths as one of our primary ways of communication, in fact for most of human existence it was THE only way of communicating. So, when we gently connect our lips to someone we like, it’s meant to create a feeling of intimacy.

11. I’m definitely not ace and kissing is often awkward asf for me. In my case I think it’s because of anxiety. I find it hard to stay in the moment and actually pay attention to my body because I’m just overthinking about what’s gonna happen next and what they think of me/my body. Once I get comfortable with someone it’s a lottt better. Before then I just try to shut off my brain and force myself to enjoy it lol. There could be multiple explanations for how you feel about it though so do some self analyzing and I’m sure you’ll figure it out and learn more about yourself!

12. did they like, pressure you a lot?

13. I’ve kissed over a hundred girls and only with a handful of them I’ve felt something.. these are the ones I’m truly attracted too and would continue to date them to see if things could work out.

14. I guess do it with someone you’re emotionally attached to/ have deep love for, you’re gon feel lots of things

15. I always felt a little weird about feeling like you do, but it definitely varies.

    I’ve kissed someone I liked and the tension about wanting to kiss (it took us like 3 years of indecisiveness) made the kiss better, like the build up of it.
    During the kiss I didn’t enjoyed it like some people do but definitely wanted more when we went our separate ways
    ( I was thinking so much while in the moment that maybe lost some of it.)

    I’ve kiss people i kinda liked or thought were cute and felt nothing at all.

    For me Its definitely about the connection with the person. Your first kiss to someone you don’t even like ( same experience) don’t mean much but a sensorial experience I guess.

    It’s gonna be better with someone you like, the experience overall,from then maybe you just don’t enjoy that expresion of love.
    Also some people kiss by trying to put their tongue first thing,of preference but for me its not it

16. My first kiss is unforgettable. Unfortunately, my first kiss does not remember our first kiss since she’s high on sugar because of the chocolates I gave her on Valentines day. Yep, i had my first kiss on Valentines day at 16 yearsold at her house while we’re making literature project that deadlines on the same day because all we did that night was make out for 3 hours.

17. I dunno, not really.
    I can feel like something, nothing, or uncomfortable.

    It’s more about what it means to you. Like does hugging feel like anything? To some it’s very comforting, to others it’s very uncomfortable.

    Don’t try and make yourself like kissing if you don’t like it. But if you are fine with it but just not feeling anything amazing then explore. If you have a partner you trust just explain how you feel and see how you guys can experiment.

18. kissing is weird unless you get a strong bond with someone and even then it still might be uncomfortable sometimes. ive only went in for a kiss on my own decision once. usually its my partner leaning in to me. theres nothing wrong with you, some people express their affection in other ways.

19. Feels good, like butterflies if theyre the right fit. For me at least

20. haha not at all- i had the same experience too! dm me if you wanna talk about it :3

21. Lmao so funny seeing this post. I remember thinking the same thing at the time. Girl plunged her tongue into my mouth immediately and I had no idea what to do with it. All I could think about at the time was two pink eels writing around in my mouth haha. Even made me wonder if I was gay for a second.

    I was high af tho. Things got much better after that 🙂 Next time will be better.

22. i never understood why people kissed

23. It was your FIRST, don’t overthink it.

24. Lol tbh my first kiss felt very weird because Ive never done it before but it felt more natural later. Trust me it gets better

25. I’m not really into kissing either but mainly because I’m squeamish and have a very strong sense of smell and unfortunately most men seem to have foul breath 🤮

26. It can be a lot of things. A bad experience can be a bad experience just like sex or a relationship. You can glorify it in movies but it’s not black and white.

    It might be your meds, might be a bad kisser, might be the wrong person, might be your romantic/sexuality. Eg. I’m leaning towards the demisexual boat so I’m not asexual, but if it’s someone’s I’m not having feelings for there is almost 0 enjoyment. When I kissed my past partner for the first time that was magical.
    Filling me with joy, excitement, butterflies in my stomach and electricity right before the lips hit, the sound the touch etc… I made out with someone on a party a while back and… I felt nothing exciting!

    You’ll figure it out, no sweat.

27. Can I ask how old you are?

28. When it’s just right, and with the right person, it’s the most beautiful feeling in the world.

29. When it is with someone you like, it feels different, not like every Kiss will be fireworks, but it feels good.

30. I wouldn’t put too much stock into it. It’s just your first kiss. You’re getting to know your romantic personality for the first time. Like with any new experience, it can take a few tries for it to feel comfortable and good. You’re just new at this and it’s an experience you’ve never had before.

    I’ve kissed loads of people, and honestly, every ‘first kiss’ with someone new can still feel a little uncomfortable. I think it just takes time for two people to get used to each others’ bodies. For me anyway, the feeling of ‘firework’ kisses don’t usually kick in for a couple weeks.

31. Did you watch chainsaw man?

32. Wish I knew