I know many people may say “oh but you’re so young” “you still have so much time” etc but let me explain my reasoning.
I’m in college and I’ve never had any experiences that were shown in the movies or that YouTubers or even my family explained it to be. I’ve spent most of it in isolation and boredom. There hasn’t been many opportunities to meet people. I’ve tried societies and failed to get into a sorority. But all these attempts have fallen void.
I’ve tried dating apps, and for those who’ve been unsuccessful in those know how frustrating and draining it is using them and they become so repetitive in terms of the guys you see on there etc.
I’ve tried “setting myself free” or the whole DONT focus on it and it’ll come to you, by concentrating on my studies and I did this for a whole year. Again nothing came. Meanwhile all this time I watch my peers get into and out of multiple relationships. It hurts. I’m still a virgin and don’t get to have the gossipy girl chats like my experienced friends do because I don’t have that opportunity. I want to have sex and be able to experience these things but I can’t.
People have said oh just keep waiting Prince Charming is coming but it’s not true if we’re being honest. Not everyone will have these experiences like some of my aunts and uncles never did, and I fear I’m on that path. I didn’t experience the love I should’ve as a child so romantic love is important to me and I’m still not able to get it. I’m not ugly or the most attractive person, I just don’t know what’s happening or what to do.
6 comments
Dating isn’t what it use to be! It shouldn’t be a struggle. I’m single going on 28yrs. 😩
I mean you mentioned the main reason in the first paragraph, you spend most of your time isolated. How are you going to find someone if you don’t go out? dating apps suck for both sides so that’s nothing new.
Prince Charming is not coming since every other girl is trying to find him. I mean guys will come to you once you’re out in public. Maybe not right away but give it some time.
Do you have any specific interest where you could meet someone? Like do you live coffee? You could join a coffee FB group or something and meet people local through there. If not coffee replace it with “x”. Hiking, golf, craft beer, food, etc. There are so many groups where you can meet people and make friends and then you’re at least more engaged in some social interest and may stumble upon somebody unexpectedly. Trying too hard sometimes makes it too hard.
Yes, dating sucks. But if you really want to find a partner, you have to do it. Simple as that. Socialize and go on dates. Eventually you’ll like someone. Maybe don’t automatically go into things with the attitude of, “this is gonna suck anyway.”
Write your number on a piece of paper and put it in your pocket before the next time you go out. When you see a guy you think is attractive, give him the piece of paper and smile and then dip. Or just put your number in his phone. I absolutely promise 100% that this method will give you immediate results.
I feel you. I didn’t get a bf until I was 21 and it only lasted a few months. I never did anything during it because I kept getting freaked out. Shit, I didn’t even start doing it myself until the past month.