So for context I’m 18 (male) and there’s a girl I like at my work (it’s a part time job and I don’t plan on staying, so I don’t wanna hear no flack for it)

This girl is very sweet and docile and she strikes me as a girl who gets uncomfortable very easily. She always has this nervousness to her even if it’s a calm situation. I really wanna ask for her snap or number so I can chat with her outside of work, but I don’t wanna make her uncomfortable by putting her on the spot

And another thing is a lot of people are against snap because it might give the impression you want it for sex, which is the last thing I want right now. Will she know by my personality that I want it just to talk more? And should I ask for her snap?

I would prefer number but that might put her even more on the spot since a lot of girls only give their number to people they’re really close to

21 comments
  1. If you do ask, I would give her the option. Like “hey you’re pretty cool and I would like to get to know you more, would you like to exchange phone numbers or if you’re not comfortable with that, maybe Snapchat?”

  2. I agree with u/brit31400 , however to put even less pressure on her I’d write down your own number or snap and give it to her. This is generally good practice as well, it puts very little pressure on them in the moment and you leave it up to them to decide if they want to move forward or leave the relationship where it is currently at.

  3. >Will she know by my personality that I want it just to talk more?

    Nope. There are too many “nice guys” who act like snakes online

    >I would prefer number but that might put her even more on the spot since a lot of girls only give their number to people they’re really close to

    Give her YOUR number. if she doesn’t text you, then you’ve been gently rejected without her having to directly confront you.

  4. tbh, as a woman, I think this scenario would create the least awkwardness: if you strike up a conversation, mention something you want to do or go and if she engages with you (“oh yeah that would be so fun! i wish!” etc) then you go in with the “oh let me get your snap and ill let you know when im going”, something along those lines. Takes the pressure off of both of you, she doesn’t need to feel creeped out and you don’t need to be trying to find the perfect sauve thing to say

  5. “she strikes me as a girl who gets uncomfortable very easily”If you don’t have any sort of relationship with this person at all you shouldn’t be asking for their personal anything.

    If you can’t first become their friend naturally it is extremely awkward, not to mention inappropriate in the workplace. It does not matter that his is a “part time job” you are 18 so you are only starting your career but take this advice…

    DON’T HIT ON YOUR COWORKERS EVER

    ​

    If you naturally become friends that is one thing, but if you straight up ask for their number or other things that can be considered harassment and that shit will stick with you from job to job. Not to mention if you somehow fuck up even harder and lawyers get involved for any reason (not saying you will, but you never know how life goes) then that shit will really ruin your career.

    ​

    Edit: I have been a dumb 18 year old in the workplace before, now I am much older.

  6. You could also ask her to an activity. If she agrees, you can ask for her number in order to coordinate said activity.

  7. maybe ask for her Instagram? I feel like is less intimate but still a way of chatting outside work

  8. Just talk to her. Texting her doesn’t matter. I became good friends with my coworker and we never exchanged numbers or anything until I decided to quit. Time spent in person is more valuable than texting

  9. Why would asking for a snap mean that you want sex? That logic makes no sense. Snapchat is basically another form of texting.

  10. When I was 17 and working a seasonal job, a boy that was awkward and shy had a friend ask me out for him. He was also 18 at the time. 11 years later and we’re very happily married ☺️. My advice would be to give her your number with a cute note and that way she can do what she wants with that information and you’ll have your answer. Good luck OP!

  11. Ask if she’s on Snapchat. If she says yes, then she would like to give you her info. if she says no, just brush it off and be like “yeah a lot of people don’t like it. I think it gets a bad wrap” or something that makes it seem like you weren’t about to ask for her info.

  12. I think it’s okay to ask for her number if you and her had conversations and are not straight off strangers. It feels safer to know someone’s background before giving contact information. Maybe you can share more about yourself, your interests, and then ask if you can stay friends and exchange contacts. That feels totally okay.

  13. Just give her your number on a paper and say something along the lines of “you’re a cool person, I enjoy your company, I’d like to stay in touch in case one of us moves on to another job.”

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