Should I stay or should I go? (24M/F)

Here’s my situation I have been dating this girl for about 5 months before we started dating we had been just friends for 10 years she had another BF she was with for like 6 years and I left for the military for 4 years. When I came back to my home state we where roommates and still friends for like 2 months now we live together as a couple. Since we’ve started dating I’ve noticed she has a lot of personal issues due to being burned in the past by other guys. Now that she is with me she can be very cold a lot of the time. She doesn’t like anything that involves feelings or when I said we should do a date night like twice a month she said as long as we don’t call it date night I’m all for it. Also a big problem for me is her complete lack of effort in the bedroom unless she is drunk. I’ve never been with a girl who seems interested and uninterested in me at the same time what do I do? I don’t want to seem needy.