Asking for advice and also venting
[I know this is a long post but I hope you read all of it if you plan on reading this]
I stare a lot at people. And about 2 months ago I was staring at this girl in the locker room. I guess I admired her and kinda jealous cause in my mind I saw her as confident, pretty, and an extrovert type with many friends. Also Back in middle school we used to talk.
When I looked at her I had no thoughts just a blank mind. I was just observing her while she was talking with her friend. And if I remember correctly I did a double take, first time was a short stare but second one I stared for too long and that’s when she looked my way. I think she caught me staring. Worst part is that she was in a bra.
So now she probably thinks I was having perverted thoughts about her and looking at her in a lewd way. Also I 100% believe I heard her talking about it with someone when I walked passed by her recently.
I would always stare at her outside of the locker room and I did this with other people that are in my classes.
I wish I could stop staring at people and mind my own business. I don’t want to make people feel uncomfortable and if I did I’d feel horrible about it.
I really hope I didn’t make her uncomfortable or weirded out and if I did I would apologize but we don’t talk at all and I feel like it would make things more awkward.
I don’t even want to go to school and I feel depressed about it. I’m just a very observant person but I want to end that. I don’t want to be known as some weirdo creep that stared at a girl in the locker room or someone that just stares a lot.
I feel like she told her friends about it cause there are 2 people I think that are her friends. And I felt like one of them gave me looks. And I think there’s another that avoids me. So while I was in the bathroom
One of them was leaning by the sink next to the one I was washing my hands in and when I walked to the sink she moved away.
How I know that they are her friends is because we all used to be talk back in elementary/middle but i stopped talking with them and they still stayed being friends in hs.
Now idk if I’m overthinking but it’s taking a toll on me.