Hey everyone, me(23M) and my gf(21F) have been together for 8 months, it’s just a couple months back that we started having sex (we both wanted to wait and that’s normal in my place). This last day while we were having piv, i lost control and ended up cumming within 2 minutes (i tried my best but couldn’t hold it) and my girlfriend started being very rude about it, that made me feel very bad (i was also having an anxious week) and i cried. It felt so embarassing but i couldn’t control it, then i was trying to eat her out, but she stopped me and she was trying to hug me, hold me and comfort me, and was also apologising, but it only felt further embarassing. I feel really ashamed and nervous to be intimate with her now, I’d appreciate some opinions and suggestions.
3 comments
It’s not really surprising that you feel uncomfortable being around her after she laughed at you while you were feeling embarrassed. I would leave my partner immediately if they laughed at something like that. It would take me a really long time to feel comfortable around her again after that.
All that being said, how did you react after you finished? Did you start apologizing immediately or did you do something else? Sometimes I have moments like this and I never apologize. Instead, I turn it into something positive like “you turned me on so much” and I just start with more foreplay and eventually go for another round.
I don’t think you need to be embarrassed for having emotions, bud. She was trying to hug you and comfort you, probably because she realized she was being a dick with her comments. I’m confused why affection would be embarrassing when you’re having a rough week already?
She felt bad when she realised putting her sexual desire over your confidence hurted you emotionally.
The fact that you came too fast and felt embarrassed is perfectly understandable and it’s ok. Crying while traditionally perceived as weakness is just a normal physiological response to such pressure.
Regarding the trust issue that’s something that can be fixed with time and communication. Basically trust is the feedback loop of vulnerability and support. Once you break it you start from scratch or sometimes with existing scars.