I’ve never felt much desire to sext anyone, unless they’re overseas and I can’t physically see them for ages, and even then it doesn’t seem to do much for me – however I think sometimes it’s expected and I’m letting them down by not embracing it.
Also, I’m not really sure how to do it. The only times I’ve sent photos or spoken sexual in a direct manner are when the lady has been leading the charge and I’ve gone along with it – is there a smooth and fun way for a guy to sex someone from scratch?
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As a guy, I think you need to tread carefully because way too many dudes sext women who don’t want those kind of messages. If you’re unsure whether she does or not, I’d start with mild flirting and build things up from there. Once you know you’ve got someone on the other end who’s up for it, tell her the things you’d want to do (and not in a creepy, use you like a sex doll kind of way). Think of if you were actually there in person and break everything you’d want to do into small chunks of text. That can lead nicely into exchanging pics but again only if the woman on the other end is cool with it.
I am only interested in casual/FWB relationships, so we’re usually pretty direct about sexual stuff. I’d say that I do some amount of sexting before meeting at least 50% of the time.
How do you sext? My sexting style tends to be more like story telling, and I just describe what I’d like to do to her. Some people go a more interactive style with each person describing an action or reaction, but I find that most people are terrible at that, and a major mismatch can just make it awkward quickly.
Try this out. “I want to be on you.”
Don’t sext from your corporate phone or your wife’s corporate phone.
Personally, I’m not into it. I’ve had interested women who asked for pics. What I sent them stopped at the pubic hair. They were always disappointed but I’m just not interested in being on someone’s camera roll indefinitely.
If you’re not into it, be firm with your boundaries.
As far as “doing it correctly”, I’m not sure there is a correct or wrong way. Just ask your partner what they want and if you’re comfortable with it, go for it. Best of luck.
I’ve done it with girls before actually hooking up but only after talking for a while, getting comfortable with each other and establishing that we both want to hookup. I don’t personally like it when someone does that before saying anything else or getting to know each other a bit so I wouldn’t do it myself to someone. As far as things to say usually it’s just talking a little dirty and flirting and gradually saying things we’d do to each other, sending a pic or two etc